Struggling Through New Beginnings

Chapter 13

Draco heard humming coming from the small kitchenette area as he entered the common room and since it was a rather odd occurrence in the Slytherin rooms, he thought to investigate who it was. He stepped into the doorway as the person was coming out and they slammed into each other.

“Sorry,” Pansy mumbled. Her head was down as she bent to retrieve the books she’d dropped.

Draco was glad she hadn’t seen his face yet, as he knew it betrayed his shock. In all their years he had never heard her hum, and most certainly he had never imagined it would be a happy, almost lyrical sound if he ever did hear it. As she straightened and looked up, he straightened his face with practiced ease and smirked at her.

When she flinched upon seeing him he raised an eyebrow, “Humming, my dear? And, what pray tell, was the song? I don’t believe I’ve heard it before.”

He watched the color drain from her face and saw her take a step back and took immediate exception to her obvious discomfort with him. They were to be married soon, after all, whether they wanted it or not. He felt a weight settle in his stomach as it hit him that he really didn’t want to marry her. She was a fine, pureblooded witch from a good family. She had been raised properly to be his perfect wife. She was intelligent, soft-spoken, pretty, and a good hostess. And, in all their years of acquaintance, she had proven to be an agreeable person. He did like her in general, but something about the thought of spending the remainder of his life with her, sleeping with her, made him feel a bit sick.

Her chin rose defiantly as she answered his question, but he barely registered her voice as he continued to think on their future. His eyes swept her face and then down and back up her small form. He took a deep breath to see if her scent had any affect on him and realized he didn’t really smell anything. Why was it that he had absolutely no feeling for the woman in front of him? She was picture perfect. If someone had asked almost any male what they wanted in a wife, Pansy would have been who they described. He acknowledged that any wizard would be lucky to have her. Why then, didn’t he want her?

“Draco!” she snapped.

He focused on her angry, upturned face and realized he had been staring at her for quite some time, but hadn’t heard a word she’d said.

“Pansy,” he answered snappishly to cover his lapse.

“I asked you a question,” she said as she crossed her arms and tapped her foot.

He almost smiled at her. She was adorable in her anger; it made her eyes sparkle. But, he didn’t think she would appreciate his view right then.

“I apologize,” he said with a shallow bow. “I was lost in thought. What did you ask?”

She seemed taken aback admission and looked at him for a moment before she answered, “I asked why you were staring at me like that.”

He shrugged and looked away from her, “Just thinking.”

“About?” she prompted.

“Just stuff,” he muttered and stuck his hands in his pockets. Then he glanced back down at her, “What are you doing back here? No class?”

She shook her head, “Not until eleven, Basic Medical Aide. And, you?”

“I had Herbology this morning, but a bit of a break before Arithmancy.”

The awkward moment seemed to have passed, so he nodded toward the common room and they moved together out of the kitchenette and over to one of the sofas.

When they settled, she asked, “How was your class?”

“Oh, it was fine, I guess,” he shrugged.