black. \ nct jaehyun × blackpink rosé.

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rosé

"no. no. no. park jisung!"

i run to my brother who was on the ground, blood oozing out of his head and onto the rock floor. i bursted in tears and put my hand over my mouth from the sight of him. he wasnt breathing and i was freaking out so much.

"hello?? my brother just got into an accident! come quickkk!! hes only 18 years old, please!"

×

the next place i saw him was in the hospital. on a bed. with a white cloth over his pale body. tears fell continuously as the doctor pulled the cloth so i could see his face.

i put my hand to his cheek and hovered my other hand on my mouth as i tried not to scream. it hurt me too much. he was the only person i could trust and the only person who made me feel happy. now its all dead.

i turn around from the sound of steps running into the room. it was my parents. they were shocked. my moms eyes filling with tears and my dads hands shaking as well as his voice. "p-park jisung..."

it was from the ground to the hospital to the funeral.

i didnt do anything at all but watch all of jisungs friends coming and mourning. there was only a few of them. donghyuk, jaemin, jeno, chenle, renjun and mark. me watching them mourn made me feel so sad. like i was the one mourning instead of them.

donghyuk stood back up after bowing to the picture of jisung. he sniffed and turned to me. "noona, jisung didnt have any friends in school. chenle, jaemin, renjun and mark hyung were the only ones he had. but even if it was only just us, he was really happy. he told us you were his best friend." every word that came out of his mouth made me breathe more heavily as tears came out. "to be honest, we pitied him. he told us about everything that happened in school. from him eating alone to him passing exams to him doing good at physical education and performance."

"do you know how much he got on his test?" jaemin asked me.

"98/100, 83/100, 96/100, 90/100."

"he told us thats how much he loved you. he loved you 98%. he told us that the 2% was the fact you were scared to express your feelings."

i bursted into tears again and watch as jeno helped chenle from the ground/tears. mark and renjun was just stood crying for a long time. it was so hard for them to take in. that fact made me so so sad.

i wasnt going to blame myself for his accident because it wasnt my fault and i shouldnt accuse myself of such fake information. but the only thing i could say was that this situation killed me.