innocent | ethan dolan

forty

loving him was like going to war

-

violet's pov;

It had been three days since I had last spoken to Ethan. I had even missed Monday since I felt sick to my stomach due to the amount of anxiety I had. Plus, the overwhelming feeling that my heart was dying didn't exactly give me a lot of motivation to go into school. Even though it was after finals and we basically didn't have anything to do. We only had to go in until Wednesday so that we had time for any last words, clearing out lockers etc.

I didn't give my father much of an explanation. I only said that Ethan and I had broke up, refusing to tell him why. He understood completely though and didn't say anything.

Joey, Shawn and Grayson had been round my house, trying to comfort me in any way they possibly could, but failing miserably. Ethan had left me countless missed calls and messages but I didn't have the heart to read them or call him back. I just needed space.

I decided that I couldn't show that I was feeling like utter bullshit, no matter how much I felt like just wearing a hoodie and joggers. I wanted to feel like I was owning my shit. Even though I really wasn't and I missed him.

I sigh, looking at myself in the mirror as I got ready for one of the last days of school.

[a/n: i realise my outfit choices aren't yalls choices but idc so pls keep ur opinion to urself ty]

I sighed to myself, throwing my school bag over my shoulder. My hair was tied into a messy bun on top of my head. I threw my bag in my car, turning up the volume up to the heartbreaking songs, which had now become my playlist for the past three days.

I felt my body fill with dread as I pulled into the school parking lot. I wasn't wearing any makeup to hide the dark circles under my eyes. I looked in my mirror, realising that my eyes had gone read because I had started to crying. I wiped them, looking if I had sunglasses to cover them. Thankfully, I did. I put them on, taking a deep breath as I got out of my car.

I seriously wasn't in the mood at the minute. I didn't want to see anyone. I didn't even want to see any of my own friends.

I get my books out of my locker, waiting for Joey. The only person that I didn't mind. Shawn told me that he'd drop and pick up Joey from now, so I didn't interfere. I kinda did miss it though. Us hanging out. But I was happy she finally found her person.

"Are you really going to keep ignoring me?" I hear a voice say. For fucks's sake, I didn't want to see his face. I didn't. I was so afraid that I would start crying.

"And why the fuck are you wearing sunglasses inside?" he adds. I put them on my head, turning to face him. I see his eyes scan mine, a look of guilt washing over him.