innocent | ethan dolan

forty-five

he loved her, but he had to let her go

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ethan's pov;

SENSITIVE CONTENT

Alicia had wanted me to go to some dumb party her and her friends were hosting. Of course, I didn't want to go. Violet was leaving today and I really wanted to see her, at least one last time before she went. I knew that everyone was over at Shawn's at this very moment. I also knew that it was the very last time they were all going to be together. But I wasn't there.

I didn't want to hurt Violet more than I had already done. I wasn't supposed to cheat on her. At all. I don't even remember it happening. All I remember is waking up in bed naked, along with Alicia next to me.

"Hey baby, lets get something to drink." Alicia smiled.

"Okay." I say. I follow her to the drinks and pick up a bottle of vodka, pouring it into a cup. I was drinking more than I should. It was bad.

"Damn Ethan, you planning to get wasted?" one of her friends say. I nod, saying nothing. I despised all of her friends. I knew they were all fake as fuck.

I take a sip of the vodka. It didn't burn, since I had it so much. I felt my body relax as I wandered around aimlessly. This happened quite a lot at these parties since all I wanted was Violet. Which meant, she occupied my mind 24/7.

I chatted to a few guys on the lacrosse team but it was still boring as fuck. After a two maybe three hours, I decide to go upstairs, away from the mass amount of people and the loud booming of the speakers. The sound began to drain away and I nearly walked into a spare bedroom when I saw Alicia and one of her irrelevant friends, who's name I couldn't remember.

I stood next to the door, making sure that they couldn't see me since I heard them say my name.

I got my phone out, and began to record them, for whatever fucking reason. My instincts just told me to.

"What?" her friend says.

"You drugged him?" she asks.

"Yes. I fucking did. God, I really missed him. I needed him but he wouldn't come to me so instead, I put a little something in his drink so he would." Alicia says giggling.

"Why are you trying to ruin Ethan's relationship? Don't you think he deserves to be happy?" he friend says. She was right.

"No! Not with that whore anyway." she says. I couldn't believe what she was saying.

That means... she raped me? I definitely didn't give consent if I was fucking drugged.

Anger fuelled through my veins as I realise she's the cause of my breakup. I blamed myself too much. Thinking why had I been so fucking reckless? Why couldn't I have just stayed home that night and watched Netflix in bed with Violet?

I still partly blamed myself. Why did I wanted to go a party? If I hadn't none of this would've happened.

"You fucking what?" I yell, looking at Alicia. Her friend jumped as my voice echoed.

"E-Ethan. What are you doing here?" she asks.

"Alicia, you do realise what you did? You fucking raped me." I spit.

"N-no. No. No. I didn't." she stutters, looking at her friend.

"I'm sorry Ethan." she says, before leaving the room. I stood opposite Alicia who had started to cry.

"You ruined my relationship with Violet! God damn it Alicia! Why are you so fucking selfish?!" I yell, in frustration.

"I just missed you." she whimpers.

"No! You missed the attention. You missed having everyone fucking worship you. I was finally fucking happy and you ruined it because all you thought about was yourself!"

"I-I'm sorry." she sobs.

"'I'm sorry' isn't going to cut this." I yell.

"I have that entire thing on video Alicia. I could go to police and show them this ." I say.

"Please don't. It was stupid. I'm sorry." she says, holding my hand. She was begging me.

"Get the hell of me." I say, jerking my hand away from her. She jumps slightly, taken aback from how aggressive I was being.

Then it hit me. Violet. I could get her back. Right? I look at the time, realising that she was probably on the way to the airport right now. I put my phone in my pocket, rushing out towards my car.

I only had one drink and I hadn't even finished that so I was safe to drive. Adrenaline was rushing through my body as I went a little over the speed limit. I needed to see her. I needed to tell her. I couldn't lose her. Maybe I still had a shot at redemption.

I couldn't believe it. All the pain I caused her. I hated seeing her so sad all because of me.

I parked my car, stumbling out looking for the right terminal. I run inside the building, after seeing my her car parked. Rushing inside, I see my brother. I looked around for Violet, my eyes scanning for any possible glimpse of her. But she wasn't there.

She was gone.

My one chance.

And she was gone.

Forever.

a/n: so thats the enddddd

yes it is over sorry bbies. <3 hehe

but fear not bc i am making w mf SEQUEL YASSSS. its called, love you like me :))))

so stay tuned. I'm going to try to publish that shit today but we'll see! :)

vote and comment!
lots if love and d,
-N