Fairly Odd Fanfiction

(1) Organic Chicken Noodle Soup

Flashback, some years into the future.

"TOM NO! I'M COMING! DON'T WORRY! JUST HANG IN THERE!"

Zap! Thunder rings through the air, lightning dances across the dark sky. High above the ground in a futuristic platform in a cold dusty planet we see our two heroes Tom and Clara as they battle hordes of highly advanced robots in a flurry of plasma and death rays.

With Tom being surrounded and captured, Clara begins to move twice as fast to rush to Tom's aid, disabling robots to her left and right with her medieval pink mace.

But she wasn't fast enough, more and more robots came into sight, with more robots arriving than she can destroy. Soon she too is captured after a laser gun is positioned behind her head, patiently waiting for her surrender.

And she did.

She raised her hands to express defeat and fell down to her knees, clutching on to her pink mace, a robot then grabbed her and they dragged her and Tom on to the edge of the platform where it seemed to be a several hundred feet drop.

"ARRGH! Walk the plank! OR BE TERMINATED!"

Two long planks hang out on the edge of a weird levitating platform and a bunch of crazy robot pirates are between a girl with a pink mace and a boy.

Did I mention that they also had a weird talking green cat as a pet?

You know how crazy this sounds?

But Tom and Clara just exchanged smirks.

With a little whisper from Tom to the green cat, the gloomy storm clouds grew more upset, like a grumbling stomach it churned and groaned and grew angry and menacing.

A cat then landed on top of a robot pirate and it scratched and tore through the robot's head as the cat became the robot's new hat.

THUMP! A black spotted dog landed on top of another robot, tackling it to the ground.

"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!" shouted a robot from the group.

Cats and dogs fell down the sky and assaulted the pirates like an artillery barrage from the sky, the cats quickly scratch and pound on every robot they land on and the dogs pull free anything that can be removed from the robots (such as an arm or a death ray) and "play an innocent game of fetch" with the poor pirate crew.

"BACK TO THE SHIP YOU STUPID MORONS!" yelled the leader.

Tom and Clara took this as an opportunity to capture the leader while the rest of its goons were yelling and screaming in retreat after getting routed by harmless house pets.

Tom then said "WHO DO YOU WORK FOR? WHO SENT YOU?!"

"I-I-I... I'm just a pirate! I'm an outlaw! Me crew would just be mercenaries if we were paid to bother you kids! You two arr a pair of demons having the sky open up to rain these cat 'n' dogs for ya and don't even get me started with your pink mace and that green cat of yours. I may be a robot pirate which is an odd combination already but at least it is cliche to some extent while you two-"

Clara glares at the robot to stop it's dialogue.

"Yeah dummy, leave the interrogation to me. Like seriously? "Who do you work for? That's so stereotypical..." said Clara.

"Ok fine, you do it, umm... I think Cosmo needs to go to the litter box anyways so umm... you deal with it." Tom responded (in fear).

Taking extra air in her lungs Clara got ready

And she spoke.

"SHUT THE HOBKNOCKER UP! I'M IN A BAD MOOD TODAY MR. ROBOT PIRATE, MY IDIOTIC BROTHER JUST DECIDED TO BECOME A FREAKING ASS TODAY AND HE EMBARRASSED ME IN FRONT OF MY CRUSH AT MIDDLE SCHOOL AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO CAUSE HE THREW A PIE AT MY FACE AND I WAS RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CRUSH AND I DON'T THINK HE FINDS ME CUTE ANYMORE BECAUSE I CHASED MY BROTHER ACROSS THE SCHOOL WITH WHIPPED CREAM ON MY FACE!"

Clara's hard breathing helped to fill the silence.

Then the leader spoke emphatically "Do you want to talk about it some more? I used to have this huge crush on this robot girl myself back in robot high school but I was always getting bullied by some robot jerks and so I looked like a huge loser, but I'm sure you'll be alright little demon witch girl, boys will eventually forget about it don't let the bullies bring you down! Forget about boys, focus on your studies! find your passion like how I did with piracy! Besides, instead of ranting and being miserable about it you should think about how to prank your brother back over ther-"

"I DON'T NEED YOUR CHARITY! YOU STUPID PIECE OF SH-"

Whoosh! A huge ship descended from the atmosphere greeting our two heroes from the clouds.

"Clara! Tom! It's time to go back home!"

Clara and Tom's mom came to pick them up in their giant spaceship, her voice coming out from the speakers under the spaceship's hull.

"Five more minutes mom!" Clara shouted back.

The speakers responded back. "Clara Sam Turner, your father and I agreed to give you and your brother 2 hours of adventuring alone, well, with your brother, but remember, rules are rules young lady. Now leave that poor old robot mercenary alone, it seems that you've traumatized it dear."

"Oh fine, c'mon Tom let's go..."

"I'M A ROBOT PIRATE ISN'T IT OBVIOUS WITH THE PIRATE COSTUME AND THE HAT?!"

"Hurry up kids, mom has an appointment at the Mars Spa Complex and I'm so excited!"

Tom and Clara walked close to the ship as it levitated above the platform, Tom was salvaging for any parts the robot pirates abandoned and got a few beam guns and other weapons, Clara started talking to her pink mace and the green cat was looking at the things Tom picked up until...

Poof! they teleported inside the ship, in front of them was the pilot who is also their mother, Chloe.

"So Tom... did you find anything cool?"

Chloe touched a few buttons to set the ship on auto-pilot and then turned away from the controls to see her kids.

"Umm, nothing much, just regular ol' boring stuff..."

Chloe exclaimed "Ooh what about those heat ray? Can I keep that? I can add those to our butler! I think I can get your father to figure that out!"

"Umm, sure mom, help yourself out. I have like a bunch of heat rays at home anyways." Tom said as he handed his mom the heat ray that's still attached to the robot's arm.

"Chloe, Cosmo and I have to go..." Wanda said.

Wanda, no longer being a mace, returned back to her normal form along with Cosmo, donning their signature fairy look.

"Aww that's too bad! are you guys gonna miss dinner too? Timmy's cooking tonight and he's making organic chicken noodle soup!"

"Oh c'mon Wanda! please? we should stay! I'm hungry! Being a cat is hard work!" shouted Cosmo.

"Sorry Chloe, we have to go back to Fairy World, they're giving Poof his first godkid and we don't want to miss that."

"That's fine, good luck you two!" Chloe responded.

"Bye Cosmo and Wanda!" exclaimed Clara.

"Say hi to Timmy for me!" yelled Cosmo.

Poof!