You Look Like A Million Bucks (Sans x Reader) [COMPLETED]

Three || Bad Jokes

"whatcha lookin' at?"

"U-Uh, nothing S-Sans!" Alphys squeaks, shoving her phone into the pocket of her lab coat.

"(Y/N)?" Sans asks, turning to you, "what's going on?" You turn beet red and cross your arms tightly.

"Just a, um...funny meme! Yeah!" You stutter. Sans grins.

"hey, could i see it? you know i love a good laugh," He asks.

"It's f-from an anime we b-both watch, r-right, (Y/N)??" Alphys says, "I don't r-really think you'd understand it..."

"nah, lemme see," Sans insists, stretching out his hand. What's he doing..? You think curiously. Your question is answered when his hand glows with magic and his left eye socket flashes blue. Alphys' phone goes flying out of her pocket and into his palm, which causes her to shriek.

"S-SANS! GIVE TH-THAT BACK!!" She shouts, lunging for the phone. Sans uses his magic and sends it far out of her reach towards the twenty-foot ceiling.

"Hey! N-No fair!!" Alphys exclaims.

"C'mon Sans, give her the phone," You say sternly.

  "not until i see what you guys were looking at," He says smugly, waving her phone around in the air to taunt you.

  "HEY!" Undyne shouts, running into the living room, "What're you doing to Alphys' phone?!!? Give it back!"

  "nope,"

  "Sans, put it down!!"

  "nope,"

  "Alright, suit yourself!!!"

Undyne builds up speed and hops gracefully onto Sans' skull, then bounces off of it and into the air. She snatches Alphys' phone...but doesn't come back to the ground. Undyne hangs in the air, clutching her girlfriend's phone which is STILL suspended with Sans' magic.

  "SAAAAANS!! PUT ME DOWN YOU PSYCHO!!" Undyne shrieks.

  "SANS??!!??1!" Papyrus calls, "WHAT'S GOING ON OUT THERE???"

  "just giving undyne some flying lessons, bro. i think she's really getting the hang of it," Sans replies, grinning up at the furious fish woman.

  "FLYING?? I DID NOT KNOW THAT YOU KNEW HOW TO FLY, SANS!" Papyrus exclaims, "I ALWAYS THOUGHT YOU WERE TOO LAZY TO EVEN GET OUT IF BED IN THE MORNING!"

  "yup," Sans replies simply.

  "Sans, please just put her down," You say, crossing your arms. His grin falters for a second when he looks at you but it quickly returns.

  "nope, sorry, can't do that," Sans says.

  "SOMEONE DISTRACT HIM OR SOMETHING!!" Undyne shouts. Alphys adjusts her glasses and tries to come up with an idea for a distraction and you furrow your brow.

Hmm...Sans likes bad jokes, right? Maybe I could tell him some and get him to let his guard down!

  "Hey, Sans," You say, grinning widely, "Why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?" Sans raises a bone brow at you.

  "...i dunno, (Y/N), why didn't the skeleton dance at the party?" He replies.

  "Because he had no BODY to dance with!!" You say, giggling like an idiot.

  "heh, nice try, but i've heard that one before," Sans says with a smirk.

"Okay, um..." You say, "what's a skeleton's favorite instrument?"