ONE PART: ONE READ

SEPTEMBER

It was second week of September when my parents finally decided to go back to the place where my grandmother, Elisa, apparently grew and enjoyed her teenage years – the Sasina. The country is not new for me because every time my grandma visits our house at Nephins she'd particularly tell me about the stories and every bit of thing that country has. As I had searched about it, it was one of the most sought countries in the world when it comes to tourism, treasures, and culture that is being envied by others because of its unity in everything that people do.

Another place, another journey and another battle to win for Elizabeth. I will be leaving my friends behind but will bring the A week I can't leave. A week after we arrived Sasina, people started to look at us. The place is peaceful for a rural community, as I looked around it is already developed with technologies, wireless connection router is in every corner of the street. The community is rich in root crops, such as sugarcane, cassava, sweet potato and rice crops that can be seen from where I am standing.

I can hear the tiny voices in my head telling me to let my other side show it to them but I tried to suppress it and smile to everyone, especially to the one whom my mother kissed with using the back palm of the old woman. Ever since I was young, I hated attention but I love it when people notice me, but today, I neither like both.

"So, I suppose this is Elizabeth Cortes?" a man with a small smile from his lips gets near me and started stroking my hair with gentleness. I looked at my right to see my father who's watching me and smile as he says, "Yes, Monsignor. The first child you ever baptized." My eyes widened with disbelief, so this man in front of me is a priest and I don't know what to react. Unknowingly, he offered his right hand so I put it in my forehead just like what I always do when grandma visits the house.

The old woman offered us for a walk as the priest of the place bid his goodbye and told us that he'll be having a mass at 8:00 in the evening; we just have to wait for the church bell to ring as a signal for the mass to start. We walked through the busy community, there are people weeding at the side of the road and arranging some of the ornamentals to make the place greener and aesthetically appealing to the eyes. I could see from my own eyes how they worked together as one and even the teenagers are volunteering their hands for help. Every time we pass by them, they will greet us and in return I'll bow a little and give a smile. I didn't mind what the conversation of the elders anymore was, I just satisfy myself with the idea that the new community I am currently in, welcomed us, especially me, with a genuine smile and reassuring hope in their eyes. If only, I lived here since I reached the age of fifteen, I wouldn't be experiencing things I couldn't even take to imagine. I wouldn't be diagnosed and became an outpatient of the best psychiatrist in Nephins; I wouldn't mind the limited time given by my parents to me. I wouldn't be harming myself just to feel fine. I wouldn't settle for less and force myself to fit in to a community I never belong in the first place.

One evening as I was walking through the empty street in the middle of the night in Sasina, I found a bridge; I inhaled sharply as I looked around, feeling odd of how irretentive the bridge was when I reached the other side of it. I walked slowly through the old steel thing beneath my shoes for it creeks every time I took a step. As I reached the middle of the bridge I ran through the railings and exhaled the breath that I was holding the whole time as I was walking. I spread my arms quickly and smiled widely for this is what freedom means. No one knows where I am, no one knows who I am, no one and nobody. I looked down and saw my reflection from the water below the bridge, even though my teeth are showing my eyes weren't smiling.

Decided with a small nod, I climbed through the railings and I almost outbalanced myself but I managed to weigh the things I am bringing, not just my whole body but also the words that keep on whispering in my ears. It's a burden and I wanted to take this entire burden away. The loudest scream that I did, echoed in the darkness that disturbed the sleeping species. I slowly sat at the railings and my feet started dangling in the air as I eyed again the water rushing beneath me.