My Bastard Mafia Leader (Completed)

Pushy

Eventually I heard my name being called and Ashton's footsteps running around to find me. He passed my section and I held my breath to not draw any attention. When I thought he was gone I started to cry again.

My breathing was uneven, I was starting to get the hiccups, and I was running out of tears to cry. To say the least, I was falling apart.

I heard Ashton before he spoke. I kept my head down and tried to hide my red teary face. He took a seat across from me on the other side and we sat in silence.

When I finally had the courage to look up I saw a mess. He was more put together than I was though. He didn't look like he had been crying or anything but he had huge bags under his eyes from a lack of sleep. His face has healed now. He still has a small scar for now but I anticipate that it will disappear. He had his eyes closed and he looked shocked, confused, angry, and most of all broken. I did all that to him.

It's funny how something so good can fall apart in one night. Especially from one action. That one action caused the crumbling of our relationship.

I put my head down and hiccuped again. He took that as the opportunity to speak. "Why?" His voice was raspy and would've been hot if we weren't in this situation.

"Why now?" He asked again. I kept silent.

"Did it really take that long to forgive me? I know I messed up and I'm sorry, but a whole month?"

Silence was all he heard. "Please answer me?"

"I forgave you after 2 weeks." I spoke quietly.

"What about the other 2 weeks? The ones where I was getting drunk because it hurt so damn much. The thought that I lost you was too much to bare. I started getting myself drunk right after 2 weeks because I couldn't take it. And what, you just let me suffer?"

"I'm sorry."

"I know I hurt you but you forgave me and let me suffer. You didn't do anything about it and I know you knew I was drunk every night. I know Nick told you." He was angry and I could hear the hurt in his voice too.

"Why? Why didn't you come home?"

"I just couldn't." It was the only thing I could think of. This is not how I declare my love to him.

"Why? Why though? Why couldn't you come home yet?"

"It doesn't matter." I whispered quietly.

"What did you say?"

"It doesn't matter." I say louder. Does it really matter why anymore? I know he is hurt and angry at me for my reactions, same as I was to his action. We both are breaking and I don't think tape is going to fix it.

It just feels as if there are too many holes to fill. We are both a mess without each other but we cause more problems by trying to be together. Actually together that is, not an arranged marriage. I try to calm myself down and get ready to tell him, but then he starts talking again.

"It matters! Tell me. I need to know!" He yelled. He looked so desperate.

"It doesn't matter. It's not going to make a difference." I said again. It doesn't matter. He won't feel the same way. He probably feels the opposite way. Why would he love me at this point anyways. I'm falling apart.

"It matters to me. It will matter to me. Whether it was because of me, because your friend needed help, because you weren't ready, whatever it is, it will matter to me. I am your husband. We were a couple, we were together. I need to know before I go insane." He rushed, his voice level increasing with each sentence. He keeps getting more and more desperate each time too. I want to tell him but my fear is stopping me.

I am also getting real mad since he won't drop the topic. He keeps pushing and pushing me. I know there is no such thing as a perfect time to tell someone you love them, but this is a really bad time. "It doesn't matter, drop the topic!"

"Tell me!" Now we are both just yelling at each other. Any previous fear in me is gone, replaced with anger. All I want is for him to stop talking. I'm not ready anymore. This was a bad idea.

"Shut the hell up! I told you I don't want to tell you!

"Fine! Don't tell me. Don't trust me, but whatever we had before is gone." He said in a stern serious voice. My fear for not telling him is going to far, but it's not stopping now. Before I even think about what I say, I speak, and I regret it.

"Fine. Be a pushy little stuck up spoiled snotty man. Go to hell bastard." I reply in the same tone. As I said before I did not think about what I just said because after that he walked away. And may I mention at some point we stood up during our fight so it was a little more heated than if we were sitting down.

He kept walking and he didn't look back. I didn't cry or feel bad about anything I said. He kept pushing me into something I didn't want. All I see is red from the fiery anger burning inside of me.

After a few minutes I walk out of the maze and go inside. His sister left at some point and right now I could care less. I went straight to my closet to find a dress. I was going to become a drunk lady tonight. A sexy one at that.

I found a tight red dress in my closet, perfect for the occasion. It went about half way up my thighs and showed a lot of skin. The neckline was deep and showed off a little bit of my boobs. It made them pop out more. Finally my back was almost bare with how the dress was designed. It had to thin spaghetti straps crossing in the center of my back. I put on makeup, red lips stick matching my dress and put my hair in curls. For the final touch I grabbed my red high heels and went out the door.

At first I decided to drive my car. I hopped in and decided against it. I went to the garage to get my motorcycle instead. It's been a while since I've rode it. I noticed his was gone as well.

Thank you for reading my story and please keep voting.

Crud is about to go down. What do you think will happen?