The Beast Fell In Love With Me

Chapter 23

Blayze POV

I sit here alone on the patio watching the sunset giving me some type of hope to push on. I really hurt Suzette and she has put up a wall around her. It's hard for me to leave after being denied to see her. Every time I leave Dorian it's Tyson who answers the door. I've tried explaining to her but I never get a word out. Days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months. My family watches me crumble and the kids watch their hero fall apart. They try their best to make me happy showing me pictures they drew, their grades, singing, and even attempting cooking. They almost burned down the house causing a fire in the kitchen but nothing was damaged and no one was hurt.

They cried telling me they miss Suzette and me happy begging we don't get divorced. I wouldn't dare let Suzette even get the chance to think about divorce. I hope she feels the same way. I've tried calling her but she lets it ring. In the beginning she would answer the phone let me say a few words and say something sharp and true before hanging up making me regret even walking out on her that night I went to the club.

I walked out on her first. I gave her a reason to walk out. If I had just told her the truth instead of holding onto my pride. My mom always told me my pride would ruin me one day. I guess that day has come. Suzette went completely silent on me after a month refusing to answer my calls. I would sit in the dark crying something I've never thought I would do. I never knew how much I really love Suzette until she wasn't there. I guess that's how we evil humans work. We don't appreciate what we have until it's gone then start praying for God to bring it back. Gosh! How much lower can we get?

How she told me that I didn't do shit just really set me off. I have a feeling she was only saying that out of anger but I just felt unappreciated and no respect was given to me lately. She didn't try to reach out which hurt me more but she can't read minds so I guess it's my fault in a way.

It's already December and I'm as miserable as can be. My birthday is in two weeks and I'm scared that I won't have my beautiful family there to celebrate with me. I've been having nightmares about Suzette with another man. I was there but no one could see me and I watched that man kiss up all over her in front my eyes and I couldn't be heard as I screamed for her to see me. Tyson comes into the office where I'm drowned in my work. Things have gotten bette but what's the point of I don't have Suzette to share it with.

"Hey I'm here to pick up Dorian," he tells me walking over to the play pin that Dorian is laying in. He sits in front of the desk and sighs asking, "How are you doing?"

"Fine,"

"Yeah, bullshit. How are you actually doing?"

"I'm doing terrible,"

"I can see that,"

"Than why did you ask,"

"Because I need you to hear yourself say it. Suzette misses you,"

"I miss her too but why hasn't she reached out to me if she misses me," I whisper scared to hear the answer. Suzette's silence towards me is making me feel like I'm forgettable.

"She's eating her sorrows. Working out way too much. She sleeps too much. I'm always hearing her cry. She doesn't take showers. All she does is say how she wants to die. I literally have to leave someone there to watch her so she doesn't do something to her self. She always mumbles your name in her sleep and wakes up screaming your name in terror. She has nightmares. She always tells me she is scared to call you that you will turn your back on her like she turned her back on you. She feels like you won't forgive and that you don't love her for not letting you explain yourself. She hates herself for overreacting. She went to that club to apologize to you. She's not seeing the hope that I see. You two both have hope you're just scared to act upon it because you guys are allowing the negative part affect your decision. You guys are meant to be,"