Plethora [Of Poetry]

[91]

today was great, but i'm 3 seconds from giving up on myself.

i don't want to say this,
but i think i'm sorry.
but it's okay.

it's okay because no one is here.
when i shut the door at night,
no one is here to see my tears.

no one can laugh at me.
i am left with me and God,
thinking if i'm even worth it.

it's okay because no one is here.
in my bedroom watching me,
counting the wet streaks on my pillow.

no one else is here crying.
and i'm grateful for the gift of life,
even if it isn't full of love-

yet.

no, you keep telling yourself.
no.
even after knowing they won't notice.

but i'm almost glad that you don't take me
seriously.
that you would laugh if i told you

today was great, but i'm 3 seconds from giving up on myself.