𝙥𝙚𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙚𝙨 𝙤𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙨𝙡𝙖𝙣𝙙 ༄

you blamed me

my heart is ripped out of my chest
i didn't mean to read your words again
so fresh they seemed, on worn paper
"so as i tie my noose i will think of you. say something before i am gone"

the day you wrote me a suicide note
was the day of my first heartbreak
you told me, it is just a poem
and i believed you
but i fell apart anyway
do you remember my tear-streaked face in english?
or were you too wrapped up in the prospect that i would never love you?
do you know WHY i never loved you?
you lied. you lied and you lied
my brain was guilt-tripped
into thinking EVERYTHING was my fault
your heartbreak
your loss
your depression
everyday was a battle to convince myself i had done nothing wrong
but one letter from you
one page full of sideways letters
that broke hearts
would break me in the end