PIMP (Completed)

twenty-five: second thoughts

PRIYA PATTERSON

One. Week.

Everything just moved so fast, but now that I was able to sit back and take it all in; I could feel myself just busting at the seams. I had thought that I had it all together but as usual; this situation was trying me, let alone the pregnant emotions that I was trying to handle during the process.

Getting a flight was nothing, getting an Airbnb was even easier; I found somewhere that I knew I would feel relaxed in and I was happy with my choice. The staff at this condo were extremely nice and catered to my every need being as I wasn't technically back to 100% yet. I was walking more or trying to at least; which was a good thing. But, since I got here and handled all the business, all I was really able to do was lay in my bed and overthink.

I questioned if I had made the right choice, if I was really going to throw away my marriage just like that; knowing I had a baby on the way. I questioned if giving in to Pharrell was the better choice... if he'd be able to find me. I questioned how Pierre was at home feeling right about now... to the point where it caused me constant goosebumps at just the thought.

I saw the way his face lit up when he found out about our child and although it was sweet, it was all too late. I wanted to focus on me, on protecting myself from whatever Pharrell could do to me physically and whatever Pierre could do emotionally. Between the two of them I had gone through enough and I know overthinking didn't make sense, but my heart was so big, and I just couldn't help it.

Did I make the right choice?

I was in between this constant question because truth be told... I was afraid of what was going to happen next. All my emotions were beginning to surround me but the most predominant one of them all; was nothing but fear. As bad as Pharrell was... Pierre was the one I was worried about the most.

I should just call him and end it.

I reached over for the new phone I had got on my nightstand and unlocked it, before I could find his number I saw my mom's and just as I was about to hit her contact; the bedroom door cracked open and I looked up to see Egypt standing there holding a bag of snacks. His eyes wandered down to my hands and he raised his brow. "You know that's a bad idea, right?"

"I just wanted to check in."

"No, you wanted to abort mission." He walked over to me and placed the bag on the bed, before taking my phone and putting it back on the table. "We talked about this."

"Don't act like you haven't called your little boo thing, Christina since getting here."

"I haven't actually... I've been taking in the fullness of the city unlike someone."

"I know." I covered my face for a moment and shook my head. "It's just hard for me right now. My emotions are all over the place. On one hand I feel like a boss for doing what I did, then on the other I feel like a backstabber."

"Well technically you did do both." He sat on the edge of the bed.

"Wow, how comforting." I rolled my eyes.

"I'm just being real. You can look at it from both perspectives, but you have to remember the reason behind it all. You did this to protect yourself more than you did it as payback. You didn't feel safe back there and until you do, there's nothing wrong with taking a moment to clear your mind."

"Ye..yeah, I guess."

"Not to mention, the women out here are bad as hell."

"At least someone's having fun."