Benefits

FIFTEEN

Yoongi stopped hanging out with their friends if he knew Myra would be there.
He doesn't hate her; he just can't srand seeing Hoseok in a happy relationship with another person.
It hurts.
It really fucking hurts.
It's not lile he can get his virginity back either.
So he's lost two things:
His virginity
And a will to live.
He feels like a toy.
A used up little sex doll.
Hoseok didn't try to talk to Yoongi.
Not like Yoongi wanted him to.
Yoongi wanted Hoseok out of his life, yet at the same time he wanted Hoseok to play a bigger role in his life.
Yoongi let tears roll down his cheeks as he sat on the bus, his earbuds plugged in as 'Lifeboat' played from his phone.
He feels like he's drowning.
He's drowning and nobody's saving him.

The weakest must go.

Yoongi relates to this song too much.
But it's right.

The tiniest lifeboat...

He's a weak link.
He doesn't deserve anything.

...full of people I know.

Life just doesn't seem to be working for Yoongi.
He hates himself for a reason.
That reason?
He's nothing like his father.
His dad is a man with high honour, while Yoongi...
Yoongi's nothing.
He's a stoner with a broken heart and a broken personality.
He's not good enough.
He will never be good enough.
He listened as the next song started.
It was on shuffle, and it decided to play 'The Me Inside Of Me'.
He wishes he could live in a better place.
But, alas, he doesn't.
He wishes that he could just let Hoseok fucking go.
But he can't.
Hs can't let Hoseok go.
He can't just walk away from so much meaningless sex and so many broken promises.
He...thinks he might be breaking down.
His breaths are getting shaky and his throat is tight.
He was told he was special.
Yoongi hasn't touched any man apart from Hoseok.

He just needs to let go.