Smoke and Mirrors - A Jemi Fanfiction

Chapter 9

Demi's pov

For me, it was a sleepless night. I couldn't go to sleep because my mind was only worrying bout today and having to tell Joe, and the rest of the family the news. I always feel nervous to tell Joes parents anything, but this news is something I'm scared to tell them. I just can't help but feel like this news isn't going to be something they approve and I just can't shake the feeling.

I wish that was the only thing that I was having to worry about, but it's not. Joe pointed out something I didn't even think about when I told my mom. What if I miscarry? How would we tell everyone? How would we have to deliver the news of a miscarriage? My mom knows how much trouble we've had to get to this point, but I still do not want to have to make the call of a miscarriage to her. I don't want to have to make it to anyone. I almost regret my decision of telling my parents, I wish I'd have waiting until I knew that this wouldn't be a failed pregnancy. However now that my parents know, it's only fair for Joes to know the news too.

"You look so tired Dems, are you sure you got a good nights sleep?" He asks.

"Yes Joe." I lie.

It's taken a lot of concealer and foundation to cover my under eyes, but they are covered and I look much more presentable for everyone now.

He lets out a soft sigh, "I know you're lying." He says under his breath.

I let the comment go since I'm just not in the mood to argue. It's not a comment worth arguing about anyway. Especially not one worth arguing about when we have all the family coming together. There's no need for preexisting tension when they all get here.

With my make up completed, I lead the way to the living room where my parents are already sitting on the couch. The sight gives me anxiety because soon they won't be the only ones on the couch who will know the news.

For me, time ticked by quickly but for Joe it ticked by too slowly. Before I know it, everyone's in the room and I am only feeling sick to my stomach with nervousness. Why did we agree to tell them this early? We shouldn't have.

"Sooo, I was told there was news. What's the news?" Madison asks which causes the conversation to die completely.

I turn my head to my little sister and look at all the intrigued faces in the room, "I got the same text brother." Nick says.

How did I not get the text? Did Joe really leave me out of a group message? I know that will be a conversation we have later.

I turn my head to Joe faking a smile to hide all the regret and worry I have hidden from him and look at his genuine smile, "We're going to have a baby." He says.

"You're pregnant!?" Madison asks excitedly.

I look back at my youngest sister and nod, "I am."

"Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! I'm going to be an aunt!? I'm going to have to figure out a way to visit you more in college! I have got to see me niece or nephew!" She squeals.

I really hope I don't miscarry this baby. The amount of excited faces in the room are too many and I don't want to have to deliver this kind of news. However what catches my eye is the unexcited look on Joes parents faces.

"Your really pregnant?" His mom asks not the tiniest bit thrilled.

I nod, "We are." I say continuing my fake smile.

"Are you two really ready?" Joes father asks.

"Yes dad, we are ready. We wouldn't exactly plan to have a baby if we weren't." Joe rolls his eyes.

"Can bipolar be genetic? How is she going to handle a bipolar child when she doesn't have hers under control? Joe already has to babysit her, how will he take care of her and the baby?" I hear his mom whisper to his dad.

How will I take care of my child if it's got bipolar disorder. She's right. I don't have mine under control or even halfway managed. Sure I go to the right doctors but it's not fully controlled. I don't want my child to have to go through that too.

I turn my head to Joe to see him giving his mom a glare which lets me know, I'm not the only one who overheard that comment.

"I hope it's a girl, I really need a niece to go shopping with." Dallas says.

"No we need a boy, Kevin's already got two daughters. We need a tiny Jonas to play football and baseball with." Nick rolls his eyes.

"I wouldn't mind being taken shopping." Madison teases.

Dallas rolls her eyes, "You complain on what I suggest."

"So will your niece once she finds her own sense of fashion. Because your sense of fashion, isn't exactly good." Madison says.

I just hope I can have a healthy baby and make it full term with this baby. That's all I want, is that too much to ask? Is that too hard of a request?

The conversation continues on its own but I make an exist needing time to myself for a bit. My disappearance doesn't go I noticed by Joe and in met with him in our bedroom not much longer after I left.

"Ignore my moms comment Demi. It was so stupid and over the line. We love love this baby no matter what diagnosis it has. I love you don't I?" He questions.

"Why aren't they happy for us? When Kevin and Danielle told them the news they were pregnant, both times they cried tears of happiness. However we tell them we are and they look as if they don't want it to happen." I say.

"I don't know Demi. I think they are worried that we aren't. That we aren't prepared for the why if's, but we are." He says.

He is, I'm not. I didn't even think about what our child might have to go through because I have it. I don't want it to have to hurt the way I do emotionally sometimes. Why isn't my mind thinking about the right things anymore? Why isn't it worrying about things like this? How did I not realize our child may be in the same position I am in the future? His parents have made me think and worry about something I wasn't worried or thinking about before and it's now one more thing I am worrying about.