Listen to Your Heart

Chapter Seven

All she had ever wanted was a love like the one her parents had. The longevity, the mutual respect, the passion, even after two children, after years of being together. She thought she'd found that with Luc, with Matt, with Taylor, for certain. She'd impulsively accepted Christian's proposal because she wanted something that would last. He'd treated her like gold, and it had been cake to ignore the warning signs that had gradually presented themselves. But he never seemed bothered by her fame or how she worked all the time, unlike many of her exes. He understood the industry and what was expected of one in the industry and he respected her as a professional, which endeared him to her from the get-go.

Theirs appeared to finally be a relationship of equality, something she'd been searching for in a partner. It was when his jealously reared its ugly head, especially if he'd been drinking, that things became problematic. She confided in only Natali when he'd text her four or five times in a day, asking where she was and what time she'd be back. He would often re-arrange his schedule so that he could travel with her and while initially, she was touched by the gesture, she'd realized it was his way of keeping tabs on her.

I don't like it, Stefi, Natali had expressed on multiple occasions. He wants to possess you. That's not love.

She'd dealt with her fair share of jealousy before. With Luc and with Matt, it had been her burgeoning success and the intimidation that success brought. Taylor had been the one she was sure would work out. Their connection was strong. But her crazy schedule, coupled with how she was always "on" when they were in public, made for a miserable on and off-again saga.

Reassuring her sister that she could handle it and that Christian was perfect in every other way, Stefani made big plans for the first time since Taylor. It was a relief to have someone again, even if he was a little overbearing when it came to who she spent her time with.

He'd told her he'd understood all the time she had to spend with Bradley, the late nights into the early morning hours and he was supportive of the film and the amount of work she had to commit to. Gradually, something changed, and he was on set frequently, staying out of the way, but keeping an eye on what was going on.

Despite telling him there was nothing worry about, he wasn't satisfied and insisted he know her whereabouts constantly. Alcohol only intensified things and often, Stefani was left wondering where the man she had fallen for had gone.

Why do you keep hanging on, she asked herself time and time again. You know this isn't going to work. Still, she kept at it, clinging to the hope things would smooth themselves over after the press junket. It couldn't have easy to be engaged to Lady Gaga and she was well-aware of the sacrifices that went with being with her and all that that entailed. Christian was doing his best, considering the circumstances.

After her flareup, she'd managed to reach for her phone to call her assistant who had let herself into the room, procured her medication from the bathroom, grabbed her a heating pad and massaged her hips for nearly an hour before the agony subsided. To her great surprise, Christian had come back after he'd cooled off, sober, and was immediately attuned to her pain, telling Ashley he would take it from there.

She had spent the following day in bed, alternating between ice and heat and not moving. Guiltily and more than a little ashamed, she texted Bradley, informing him he'd have to do the interview scheduled that day alone, but she should be well enough to finish up the rest of the press there.

Christian, to his credit, had been wonderful. He was attentive to her needs, distracting her with silly YouTube videos and take-out from the best Italian restaurant in the city. He hadn't mentioned their fight, hadn't brought up Bradley again and she relaxed considerably. It had been ages since they'd enjoyed one another's company and so she reveled in the calm while it lasted.