I still love you | Maylor fanfiction

21

Roger's P.O.V.

It was the late afternoon when my doorbell rang. I already ate a small meal for lunch, cleaned my room for a bit, and started working on some songs.
I placed my coffee mug on the table, going to get the door and see who it was. The gang from yesterday left my keys inside the apartment, so if I had my door locked they had no way to get in - mocking me, another spit in my face. But at least, they couldn't break in and do something to me again.

As soon as I opened the door, a slap came, the sudden pain forcing me to stumble back with a groan, my cheek burning.
"What the fuck?!" I yelled, holding my face and looking up, just to jump up in shock as I revealed Esther, that one Esther, rushing past me into my flat without me even welcoming her in. She didn't bother to take of her warm coat she was wearing as it was cold late November outside, her hair tangled in a mess, stomping in fury, her eyes shooting lightings.
"Oh come on, what else is going to happen today?!" I whined. "What the hell was that for?!" I slammed the door behind me, pissed off that I had to see her and even talk to her, in my flat, which she so harshly invaded.
"What the fuck were you doing there yesterday?!" She snapped, folding her hands, shaking in anger which I really didn't understand.
"Me?!" I couldn't believe her. "What were you doing there? You were promenading there like a slut! You are a slut!"
"I'm not!" She defended herself in rage.
"And what are you then?! I saw you there! That's what sluts do!"
She didn't have an answer for this as she stayed silent, staring at me from the other side of the room. If looks could kill I would be dead at least seven times by now.

"Does Brian know this?" I inhaled deeply to calm myself down a bit. I didn't want to get in a stupid argument with this stupid chick.
"What do you think? Of course not," she replied, rolling her eyes at me as if I was an complete idiot.
"You didn't tell him?" I raised my eyebrows in disbelief. Yesterday, I was in such a shock, I just wanted to run to Brian's immediately and tell him, everything. But I had time to think about it, and considered he already knew and was okay with it. I really didn't expect her to come up with this.
"You must not tell him. You must promise you will never tell him," she frowned, a dead serious expression in face as she stepped towards me.
"Wait a minute," I froze in shock as everything started to make sense. "You don't even study. You lied to him about studying pedagogy."
"Roger listen to me. Promise me you won't tell him."
"Why would you lie to him like that?" I ignored her, unable to wrap my mind around it.
"Well, so that I could be with him!" she exclaimed, nerves clearly boiling and patience running out. "He would never even talk with me if I told him what I really do!"
"So you lied to seduce him, and control him," I scowled in realization. That little bitch. I knew something was wrong about her. I was right. She was just controlling a Brian the whole time. But why him? I mean yes, he's kinda hot but- she could have anyone else. Why did she chose him?

"No! It's not that way!" She turned around and faced me again. "I love him!"
"You don't love him!" I scoffed, her despair bringing me evil happiness.
"I do," she stabbed me with a cold look. "And if you don't want to believe it, you sure know he loves me. Not anyone but me. And if you tell him this, you'll break his heart."
"I won't break his heart," I defended myself, a cruel smile on my lips as I was starting to get on top of things. "It's you who will. I didn't do anything wrong. I'm not a slut."
"But he won't even believe you," she snapped back, raising her chin haughtily. "What do you think, will he rather believe me or you?"

My smile faded as the truth of her words landed on my shoulders. We did consider it yesterday with the guys in the car, but when it came from her mouth, it revealed the real trap we were in. She was right.
"Me," she chuckled when she saw my worry. "Of course. If you try to tell him, he will only hate you."
She was so damn right. I couldn't do anything. Brian would only get pissed and hate me. But deep in my heart I knew he should know, I had the greatest need to tell him. But there was nothing I could do. Esther has me in her trap.
"God, what happened to you?" She said this word with any sight of affection, her voice cold and serious, as some kind of a heartless machine.
"What?" I frowned in confusion, lost in my own thoughts, sinking in depression.
"Your bruises," she ignored my looks, stopping closer, examining skin on my forearms, stretching out to even touch it.
I hopped back, in fear she might reveal more and realize what happened. She was the last person on earth I would want to know.
"Get out," I stopped her abruptly, stepping away from her.
"Please?"
"Get out of my flat!" My voice got uncontrollably louder, as panic was creeping inside of me.
"Alright," she backed off offendedly. "Bye then," she gave me a last cold stab of eyes before stepping out of the door and closing it shut behind her.
I exhaled, sighing with relief that she didn't insist on looking at my skin.

This day kept on getting worse and worse. I was scared to think all the situations which happened through and decide what to do next. And I was freaked out of what might even come next today.

Deaky's P.O.V.

Today, after recording, it was Bri who took us home. We dropped off Freddie at his flat first, then we headed to mine. I couldn't keep my mind of that kiss, even though I tried as hard as I only could. My mind was still being lurked into that memory, the feel of his lips on mine, the taste of his soft skin, his aroma from so close and the warmth of his body. I could feel the memory in my body, me head spinning and legs turning to jello every time I lived through it again.
When Freddie was leaving, I felt as if I should do something, I wanted to do something. I wanted to get out of the car with him and tell him everything. That I couldn't stop thinking about yesterday, that I couldn't keep this feeling to myself anymore, that I wanted, desperately needed more.

But in the last second, I controlled myself, and forced myself to not do so.
Hours later, in the eventing, when the darkness already began to fall, I was still torturing myself with these thoughts. They hadn't left my mind for a single second, no matter what I did. Until, in the end, I just gave up. I threw on a coat, grabbed the keys of my flat, in a rush leaving and stepping out on the street.
I didn't have a car, I was still saving for it. By walk and subway, it was about thirty minutes from my place to Fred's. I didn't even know what I was going to do, what I was going to say, but hopefully this time will be enough for me to figure it out.

It was not.

Way too early, I was standing outside Freddie's door, insecure, irresolute, frightened, as a child. I stood there, taking breath after breath, small clouds of mist escaping my mouth and disappearing into the dark. Now I felt embarrassed that I came all the way here. What if he had some guests? What if Mary was there? What if he wasn't even home? And if he was, what the hell was I going to say? Hi Fred, how are you doing? I could just throw at him my emotions, just like that and leave. But that was all I had. I was full of emotions not words. And I needed to let them all out.

I knocked on the door.

My heart rate rose, immediately I wished I'd never knocked, I wanted to disappear and even considered running away. The seconds were ticking in my head as I stood there in the cold, frozen in place, staring at the door.
Then, the door creaked, and revealed a wide line of warm light, and Freddie's figure, cheeks red and hot, appeared in it.

"Hi, my darling," he frowned with a smile, the most beautiful smile I had ever seen. "What are you doing here? Aren't you cold? Do you want to come in?"
I couldn't wait anymore. I realized I knew the whole time why I came.
I leaned in, bringing my hand up to his cheek, pressing my lips gently against his.
With our touch, everything around disappeared, and was gone for now and forever. All the sounds, the lights, the stress and worries from past and future, influences the feels we're still present. The warmth, spilling from him to me, his pleasant breath brushing against my face softly. His softest skin on mine, the sweet intoxicant taste.

I was caught up in the moment, until he slowly, very slowly and halting pulled away, resting his forehead pressed against mine.
"What was that for honey?" I heard his voice quietly ask, as we both stared to the ground, avoiding eye contact.
"I couldn't stop thinking about yesterday," I mumbled.
"Me neither," he confessed with a light distant chuckle. I looked up, staring into his glistening eyes, so close to mine.
"And I realized I wanted more," I breathed out.
"And I did too," he whispered silently, slithering his hand in my hair, his deep exotic eyes not leaving mine for a split second. Then he moved closer, closing the space between us again, and with the connection of our lips, a cascade of pure feelings of joy, happiness and whatever else I could recognize exploded in me again.

And so we stood there, in the middle of the night, in the opened door frame, hugging and kissing from pure emotions, letting all our feelings out as if the world should end tomorrow.

YEEEEEEEHAAAAAAAW
YA DEACURY BITCHES BE GRATEFUL