Zenitsu X depressed!reader

nightmares

TRIGGER WARNING:SELFHARM

"!!!"

I waked up startled

"..another family and friends nightmare huh?"

I slowly rose from the bed

It was 3AM
Right next to me inosuke,tajiro and zenitsu was sleeping very peacefully.

Suddenly tears trickled down my face.

'Shit..!I should go to bathroom before anyone sees me..!'

I opened a small bag to see a small knife,a bandage

'Good.Its all here.'

I went into the bathroom and locked itThen I started to slowly roll up my left sleeve to reveal hundreds of old and fresh cuts. There was scars beneath,but the cuts were too many to see them.

It started from the wrist and went to the shoulder.I rolled up another sleeve to reveal the same.Then i started to cut my arms like it's was a paper

'Maybe i should cut where i haven't..'

I looked at myself in the mirror to find a Beautiful young girl.I stared into my eyes only to find lifeless dull eyes.

'Hmm...maybe i should try abdomen..'

I took a knife in my hand.Taking a deep breath,i slowly cut my abdomen with my knife.

'16..17..18!I think that's enough!'

I wrapped my arms and abdomen with bandages.

'..huh?'

A small drop of water fell onto my fingers
only to find it was my tears.

Suddenly i broke

'How did i got myself into this...!!!'

I sobbed and sobbed until somebody knocked on the door

'What the..!!'

I cleared my throat.

"who is it??"

"(Y/N)..are you OK..?? I heard you sobbing and... I was getting worried.."

'Oh shit!!its zenitsu..'

"ZENITSUWAITASEC"

I cleaned my blood and things as fast as i can then checked myself in the mirror.

'Good..!no blood marks..!'

When everything was clean enough,i slowly opened the door.Behind the door was zenitsu looking worried

"(Y/N)..can we talk..??"

"Yep!!"

Me and zenitsu walked along a corridor

'Ah..!! Im freaking out..!! Did he find about the cuts!? Why is he so serious!!'

zenitsu and i sat on a bench(we were staying at shinobu's butterfly mansion)

"Soo~?whacha wanna talk about??"

I said cheerfully to cheer up the mood

"(Y/N)."

"Yes..?!"

I startled at the low,serious voice,unlike zenitsu.

"Why were you crying..?"

"..."

I was stunned.zenitsu was being serious.

'I didn't know he could get that serious..'

I gulped

'I can't let anyone show about my true self..even zenitsu..I gotta make up some lies to believe that im okay..'

"ZENITSUUU~!!"

I whined

"Wha-!?are you okay!?"

Zenitsu startled,suprised at my sudden tears

"I was having a bad dreamm~!"

I rushed into his arm to reassure the boy

"You,inosuke(*sniff)and tanjiro was killed and..and..I couldn't do a thing..!"

"There,there it's ok! I'm here! I'm not gonna die!My heart is still moving ya' know!"

"Yeah..(*sniff)i can feel your heartbeat in your chest..It's really comforting.."

"..!"

"Zenitsu?why are your face red??Did you catch a cold or something??"

"N..no..im fine.."

Zenitsu slowly but tighty hugged me

"!!?!?!"

My mind was going crazy

'wha..!?he..just..did zenitsu just..hugged me back..!?! THE zenitsu?? THE Zenitsu who gets nervous around girls??'

It was frustrating to admit,but i can feel the zenitsu's warmth and reassuring kindness. My heart started to beat faster and faster.
When we were apart from each other, zenitsu and my face was soo red,that i thought our face might blow off

"Uhh...so..!thanks for comforting me..!!"

"No problem (Y/N)!Now I'm go to sleep again"

"You go first! I want enjoy the view until i get sleepy!"

"Oh!okay!"

Zenitsu stopped at the doorway

"(Y/N)..?"He said without looking back

"Yea??"

Zenitsu turned around

'What's with that expression zenitsu..?'

"..um..nevermind"

And then he disappeared from sight.

"..."

I looked up into the nightsky.Enjoying the scenery without knowing what might happen tomorrow.