For the sun did not like to see me, I hated myself
I thought if the sweetest, the brightest, and the kindest did not want me who would've
I looked at my reflection in the end of everyday, and did not forget to point the scars that danced all around my body
I did not forget to point the bees that sucked the sweetness out of me like anxiety sucking my confidence, and filling me with bitterness
Did not forget to blame myself for mistakes I did not make
Did not forget that I did not love everyone as I should, and for that I'm worthless
Did not forget to envy the beauty the sun had
The orange that made her grace show harder everytime
Even the moon did not like to see me
I thought if, the softest the prretiest, and kindest did not want me who would've
I did not forget to point that my mother hated me, and loved the moon a littletoo much
I did not forget to point that no body will ever love me, for I would never stand a chance in front of them
That I'd never reach anyone's league
That all will fancy the softness of the moon, and hate the rough me
I did not forget to point that my kindness is fake even if I did not believe it
But the earth whispered,:" i don't know if you noticed, but you are the light dear
You are what they fear
For without you they will crawl in darkness, and their fairness will disappear."
and since that day I saw that all my scars were part of them too;
all those scars were well drawn in every painting of Picasso.
I loved them so much that it hurt,
my anxiety feared my smile now like I cursed her.
for every mistake I did not make I lighted a candle and prayed for those who tried to make me believe I did,
I did not love everyone but I did not hate them
Love is filling me and I'm not afraid when I'm picky to give it,
I did not envy the sun for her beauty because I was the light that made her shine.
Now I realised that my mother loved me because she saw me in my full form helping the moon to give softness no one gives.
I believe only few truly love me and for that I'm grateful;
They make me feel worthy,
I feel worthy because of me, too.
And for those who tried to make me feel like I'm far from their league,
Yes, I'm far-away
you can never reach me.
I always think of earth when she showed me that without me the world mattered less
That the world matters less with everyone hating them selves.
For her loving myself made another flower.
YOU ARE READING
winter
PoetryA poetry collection that Witnesses the expansion of a human heart through seasons, through years. cheesy love, painful love, kind love, politics blended into poetry, mental abuse that cannot be romanticized, literature, movies and music, religion an...
