The Ghosts Of Her Past (A Completed, Steamy Romantic Mystery)

Part Twelve

I got the prescription he wrote and stuffed it into my purse, then walked to my car.  As soon as I sat down, I burst into tears. I have no idea how long I sat there crying and internally cursed myself for actually forgetting Lisa is dead. I caught myself thinking I should call her for comfort, but she's no longer there for me to lean on.

I cried even harder and threw my phone down.  Waves of sickness hit me as my hands are still shaking, and I even tried to wrap my arms around myself to soothe the pain running through me right now. 

Then I remember something Lisa once said.  "That's the thing about life, Cora.  It's not a one chapter story, life should have several chapters that are filled with fresh starts."

I smiled just a tad as I remembered her words.  I guess the last chapter was just a little short, I'm starting a new one already.  I made a decision in that moment, I have to start taking better care of myself by eating better and resting more often. I always wanted a baby, but not under these circumstances.  This is something Lisa will never have a chance to do, and I have to appreciate everything life gives me.

I started my car and went to the pharmacy to get the vitamins I need, then went home.  I already know abortion isn't something I could live with, and there's no way I could hand my own baby away to strangers.  My pregnancy will occur in front of thousands as I progress and work in front of the camera. 

My parents weren't home when I got there, so I went to my room and needed some alone time to think.  I am nowhere close to being ready to talk to Gray.  I'm not sure of many things right now, except for one, I do not want a relationship with him.  So when I do talk to him, I have to make myself absolutely clear that we are never getting back together.  We might share a child, but I won't raise it in a miserable relationship.  I care for him, and we share an intense attraction, but I don't love him in the way that either of us deserves. 

I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror.  The woman looking back at me is just a shell of the woman I was when I was in Seattle.  My baby deserves a healthy mother, and its time I move past the pain and anger.  It's time to focus on my health and my child.  I won't stop my search for Lisa's family, but I will put myself first. 

I washed my face, then went downstairs and made dinner.  My parents came home, and Mom seemed happy to see me in the kitchen.

"It seems Dr. James helped today?" Mom asked.

I nodded.  "Can we talk?"

"Sure sweetie, have a seat." We sat at the kitchen table.  "Did he prescribe anything?"

I nodded.  "Yeah, he did, Mom.  Prenatal vitamins."

She tilted her head in confusion. 

"I'm afraid I'm not following." She said.

"I think you are, Mom."

"What, how, I mean..wait.  You're saying you're pregnant?"

I nodded.  "Yeah, and I have to take care of myself.  The house will be ready in a few weeks, so I guess I'm starting a new chapter." I said.

"Wait, go back to the pregnancy thing, are you sure?" She looks very concerned.

"I'm due July 18th." I try not to show how much fear I'm in right now."

Her eyes shot up really big.  "I'm going to be a grandma?"

I smiled and nodded.  "Who's the father?  Are you getting married?"

I sighed.  "No, I am absolutely not getting married.  Gray is the father, but I'm not ready to tell him yet."

My mom is speechless, I guess I need to let her process everything.

"Oh my God, a baby!  A baby is always a blessing!" She reached for me and hugged me tightly.

I let out a breath of relief. I wasn't sure if she would be disappointed, but she seems okay.  She might just be acting this way to be supportive, and I have a hard time believing she's this happy about her daughter having a baby out of wedlock.

She pulled back and looked at me.  "Can we tell your father?"

"Maybe over dinner?  I'm not sure I am ready for that drama yet." She nodded in understanding.

"Well, I will help finish dinner." She got up and so did I, then we finished making dinner as we talked about pregnancy and how I should talk to Gray.  That was, until my phone rang and it was Kathy.

"Hi Kathy," I answered.

"Hi there, I am calling with some news.  The M.E. determined Lisa did in fact die of natural causes.  It seems she had a brain aneurysm and likely died instantly.  It was severe, and there is absolutely nothing anyone could have done to save her life.  She didn't suffer, and she wasn't gone long when she was found.  They are saying she was only gone for about an hour." She said.

"I guess that's good news, I would have had a harder time knowing someone took her life.  So the funeral home was a coincidence?  Would she have experienced symptoms?" I asked.

"I also asked that question, and the M.E. said she wouldn't have known.  That doesn't mean the cremation and Will planning isn't suspicious.  Otherwise, I am still working on finding her identity, and I will let you know the moment I find something." She said.

"Thanks, Kathy, and I hope to hear back from you soon."

I told Mom, and she seemed relieved there was no foul play involved.  We ate dinner, then talked to Dad, but he wasn't as happy about my pregnancy as my mom and said he wants to rip off Gray's head.  He will get over it soon enough, it wasn't just Gray's fault.  When we were done, I went upstairs feeling much better to have a good meal in my belly.  I spent a few hours looking over the missing person's photo's, then went to bed.  My days end earlier than most people's because my day starts early, so I need a good night's sleep.