The Ghosts Of Her Past (A Completed, Steamy Romantic Mystery)

Part Forty Three

"What do you want, Blaine?" I asked.

He pressed his lips against mine and kissed me before speaking against them. "All of you." He whispered, then deepened our kiss, separating my lips with his tongue and dove in, caressing mine.

Blaine's kiss is demanding, but gentle. It shoots desire through me as I have never felt before, causing my heart to pound against my chest.  There's more to this kiss than I ever knew could exist.  This isn't possible, I've only known him a few days, but I am falling hard.  How could this happen while I'm carrying another man's baby?

He reached down and lifted my leg to wrap around him.  My hips move instinctively against him and our breaths rapidly changed.  His lips abandoned mine when they trailed down my face and to my neck, making me shiver.  The heat between us makes my body feel like it's on fire, and I'm throbbing between my legs. 

That's when it occurred to me he's been drinking, and he's emotionally vulnerable right now.

"We should stop," I said, and he paused before he lifted his head.

"Why?" He looked down at me, and, Jesus, he's a beautiful man.

"You've been drinking, and you're vulnerable tonight.  Let's just put this on hold until you're completely sober and had a chance to think about things.  If we make love, it'll mean something to me, and I need you to have a clear mind." I said.

He rested his weight on his elbows and brushed the hair out of my face.

"I know what I want, and I only had two drinks.  I am sober, and I've thought about you since the moment you walked into my office.  I'm not taking your pregnancy lightly, I promise." He said.

"Please, just take your time.  I need to know you're okay with this baby, because I do love it already, and I care for you already.  Could you please just sleep on it?" I asked.

He groaned. "If that's what you want, but I've known about your baby all along." He caressed my face with his thumb as he looked down at me.

"Please?  I don't want you to have regrets.  I already lost my best friend, and I'm scared to give myself to you so quickly, only to lose you."

"So, is it sex you're putting on hold or giving me a chance?  I know what I want, I don't know how to make that more clear." He asked.

I felt a smile on my face.  "Sleep on it, think long and hard about it, because you don't even understand what I am facing with Gray, and he won't make it easy on either of us.  You'll have to accept him in your life too, he does have every right to know his child."

He smiled back.  "You're being fair to him, despite his behavior.  That's actually very mature, and I respect that, I promise."

"He hasn't done anything wrong as far as this baby is concerned.  I made a choice I will have to live with for the rest of my life, and if you truly want anything with me, you will have to live with it too.  Not just that, but the judgments and ridicule for committing to a woman who got pregnant by someone she doesn't love." I said.

"I already know these things, I'm just worried you see me the way Cassidy saw me.  I would be proud to have you on my arm, just like I was proud to be Cassidy's brother, but I failed to show her that when she was alive." He said.

"I thought you were going to lose respect for me.  I'm sorry I felt that way." I said as I reached up to run my thumb over his lips.  God, I love these lips.

"I probably made you feel that way, and I am sorry.  It's just, I never thought in a million years I was capable of falling so hard.  The first thing I noticed was your beauty, then the fire inside you that sparked my curiosity.  Cora, I have never felt so relaxed and free around anyone, not even Ciara.  When I saw you cry today, I thought I was going to have a heart attack.  My chest felt tight, and all I wanted was to be close to you.  If you'll give me that chance, I'll give you all the time you need."

"Let's get some sleep, and if you still feel the same, come tell me," I said.

What's happening to me?  This is Lisa's brother for God's sake, but as I look up at him, I see someone amazing.  Someone I want to make love to and never let go. 

"I'll see you in the morning." He smiled, before he kissed me one last time and got up.  He held his hand out to help me from the floor, then walked me to my room.

He held both my hands.  "My mind is not going to change before tomorrow." He leaned down and kissed my cheek.  "I'll see you first thing tomorrow morning." He whispered, before walking away and leaving me standing in front of my door.

A sigh escaped me before I walked into my room and laid down in my bed. Blaine awoke something inside me, and I'm more scared now than ever.  What if he only wants me because I'm pregnant and reminds him of his sister.  Maybe he thinks giving in to a life with me, is a second chance to be a better man.  One that is more accepting and less conservative.

I shook that off when I remembered how his lips and body felt against mine.  Those moments were the most intense moments of my life, there's no way he doesn't feel it too.  My body became heavier and my eyes drifted shut.  I'm too tired to think anymore today, so I drifted off into my dreams.