The End (hunger games fanfic)

Chapter 11

I stare at Prim in shock, had she really followed me here? Had I really been that careless? What if someone who actually cared had followed me and reported me to the Capitol. I would be dead. You not though, I reminded myself, your not but your best friend might be soon. I feel tears rolling down my face. Why couldn't it have been me? I would have rather i went into the games than watch someone I love in them. I thought about what I had just thought. I was sure that I did love him now, and I want, wait no need him to come home. I wish I could tell him that. Prim sat down and hugged me. She was very mature for her age. "It's alright, it's alright," she whispers to me.
"No it isn't. I need him to come home," I say, bursting into tears for what feels like the one hundredth time today.
"He is dead yet Katniss, remember that."
She's right. He isn't. We sit in the forest, for what feels like forever. Even if I wanted to move I wouldn't be able to. "Katniss, Snow announced that straight after the interviews the games would start, I don't know why."
I look at Prim confused. Why would he do that? I don't know but I'm not going back. "I don't want to watch them, but you should. I don't want us both getting in trouble," I say emotionlessly. I feel lifeless again. She nods and stands up. I open my mouth to say something but she cuts me off. "Don't worry I know how to get back," and without saying anything else she walks off. Prim had never been one to enjoy the woods. Actually she doesn't even like them. Why did she come here? Then it hits me. She loves me. Of course she does she is my sister. She is facing her fear if the woods to comfort me. I guess I would do the same for her. I would volunteer for her if she was drawn at the reaping. I sit on the hill in the meadow, day dreaming about how my future could end up.

I'm not sure how long I have been here, but I'm sure it's a while. The games would have started at least three hours ago. I wonder if Prim and mum are at home or with the Hawthorne's comforting them. Is Gale even alive? I hope so. He's smart enough. He's strong and he can hunt. I think back to the interviews. I wonder if Prim's friend Arial is still alive? 12 yet olds usually die fast. I hope she was smart enough to get out of the cornucopia fast. I should be at home, watching the games, but I'm not. It's actually illegal not to but I couldn't care less now. I keep having thoughts, way of how Gale could die. He could get stabbed. If he does die I hope it's fast. I don't want him going through any more pain than he already has too. I also hope he wins and our fundraiser raises enough money to help him. I think back to my morning with Peeta. I had smiled and laughed. It was nice to have a friend to talk to. It was surprising really, after all these years of not talking, it was like we never stopped. I am not actually sure why we stopped talking. Maybe it just happened. I don't really know. If he doesn't make it back... I don't want to think about that. I feel tears forming in my eyes, I refuse to cry again. I must be strong, for Prim.
I decide to hunt again, maybe it will take my mind off things. I shoot three rabbits and a bird, but my mind never leaves Gale once. I decide it too much and carry the game back to town, selling a rabbit and the bird, keeping a rabbit for my family and one for Gales and half the money I make selling the other game. I walk to the Hawthorne's house, quiet fast but I'm not sure why. I want to know he's okay, if he's dead though... I can't afford to think like that when I reach the frog door I let myself in again. I walk in and see the T.V, Caesar Flickerman is on screen, talking about stuff that's too unimportant for me to care. "Hazel," I say, passing her the money and rabbit. She knows the silent question I'm asking and nods in respond. He's still alive. I sigh in relief. "Thank you Katniss," she says, walking into the kitchen with the money and the rabbit. I sit on the couch next to Prim, but unlike usual I don't ignore my mother. For once I feel sympathy for her. I know why she went like she did when dad died. I look her in the eyes, remembering the times she wouldn't even speak one word, and imagining my face like that now. I feel her pain, the pain I still see in her eyes. It has never left her, she has got better, but never fully recovered. She grabs my hands from infringing of Prim, who just sit there, not wanting to ruin the moment I guess. Prim always wanted mum and I to have the connection we did when we were younger again. "I'm sorry," I say to her. She knows I'm apologising for every time I've yelled at her, every time I've rejected her when she has tried to do something nice, for not being more understanding about dads death. "As am I," she says in return. I know she is apologising for shutting down, ignoring us. "I understand," she says also. I see confusion on Prim's face but I understand her perfectly. Mum understands that I could shut down like she did. And she won't judge me for it, even if she starves to death while I'm in my own world, one where Gale exists. I know I can't be like that, I won't let Prim die. And for once, I can't let my mother die. I look at the screen, releasing mums hands, and see Gale for the first time since the games started. He looks tired, and it's only been a few hours. I feel nothing again. That disappears an is replaced with anger and hatred for the Capitol. It's there fault Gale could die! its there fault 23 children are going to die! they don't deserve it, they don't! No one does. Then my eye focus back on the tv and I realise Gale is running. No he's being chased... by careers.