contradictory

forty

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millie was scared. terrified, even. seemed it was just yesterday she was pacing the aisles of the market looking for those future tellers. she had absolutely no reason to feel scared, but could you blame her?

it wasn't that finn and her were trying for a pregnancy, they were just not being as preventative as they usually would. getting through the first year of marriage unscathed definitely helped open the idea up and allowed it to linger in the air, but there was no plan.

the time around the cashier at the registerton to check the items out didn't offer a sad smile like the one years prior, and maybe it was the ring on millie's finger or her seemingly composed stature, but inside millie was terrified.

and this time when she got home, she didn't stuff the boxes away and attempt to hide them or try to avoid taking the tests, she got it over with. she took the multiple tests after drinking a load of liquids and waited for the results. while awaiting the answers, she flipped on the television and ended up falling asleep on the sofa.

it was when the door slammed shut and a tired, exhausted looking finn sighed loudly that millie shot up from her spot on the couch, making sure finn didn't go anywhere near the bathroom where the tests rested with the results, she failed.

she left the light on during her nap, and before she could get to finn he opened the door to turn the light off, but barely, just barely caught a glimpse of the sticks laid out on the sink.

"millie?" his voice was confused and she cursed repeatedly in her head, not wanting to go in and see the results and finn's reaction. he walked out with a few of them pinched between his fingers. "um...something to tell me?"

"baby?" was all the left her mouth in a timid squeak when her eyes saw the pink plus sign on the tests in his fingers.

"what was that?" he needed it spelled out for him.

"i'm pregnant," she looked him in the eyes to see the amusement and joy warming his face.

"i put a baby in you!" he happily cheered after setting the tests down and lifting her in his arms. she still had to come down from the initial shock of the tests reading positive, but seeing how happy finn seemed helped.

"i think i may have helped, but yeah," she wrapped her arms around him. the smile he wore was the largest she'd seen in a while and so was hers.

"we have to call our family! we need to tell everyone!" he excitedly rambled. "oh, i'm going to be a dad!"

"let's hold off on announcing it to the universe until we go see the doctor," millie chuckled at the enthusiasm. "tests are generally the same, but it's nice to have that confirmation."

"try and call first thing in the morning! see if they can fit you in tomorrow," he eagerly suggested. "i'll call off work and go with you."

finn went to bed with nothing but excitement filling his heart, but millie felt nervous. how could she not?

the doctor scheduled them in when a patient canceled last minute, and finn made sure they were on time, early actually.  pregnant women were seated in the waiting room and finn couldn't wait to see millie big and pregnant. although they hadn't planned anything, he couldn't seem to think about anything else.

the doctor confirmed what they already knew, and finn cheered once again as if he found out for the first time. millie, however, needed to inform the doctor of her previous experience. she needed to be well prepared with information and reassurance. finn understood, and asked questions as well to inform himself.