Into An Idiot

8. Simple

"Ashton." I say softly, and my brother looks up. Michael holds his arm on his chest, hiding his scars.
Ashton puts a closed sign over his register, slides over the counter, and leads us to a table.
"Michael, what happened?" He asks, placing his hand on his friends shoulder.
Michael shrugs, wiping his eyes.
"Are you okay?"
He shakes his head.
I hug him, and he sobs into my shoulder.
"I'm sorry." He mutters, lifting himself off me.
"Sorry for what?" I ask, keeping my arm on his shoulder.
"For being so clingy... I know you hate me." He says between tears.
"I don't hate you." I brush his hair out of his eyes with my fingers.
"You do." He whimpers looking into my eyes.
"Oh, God, Michael, stop telling yourself that."
"I am annoying you." He cries, flicking my hand off his shoulder.
"You're not, I promise." I put my hand back in its former position.
Ashton looks at us sadly.
I pick up Michael's arm. I don't care if people are staring because he's crying and I'm speaking loudly over his sobbing and my brother left the register even though people behind us wanted to order.
I hardly have to push back his sleeve to see the new scratches on his skin.
I kiss each letter that's etched into him.
I.
D.
I.
O.
T.
Five letters, five kisses.
"I love you, Idiot." I say, my voice shaking.
Michael throws himself onto me in a hug.
He's not crying anymore.
"Thank you, Soph." He whispers. His voice is hoarse.
"You're crazy, Mikey." I say.
"Come home with us." Ashton says. "You can keep us company, it's very lonely at night."
"Really?" Michael asks.
"Yeah. My shift's been over for a minute now anyway. Come on, we're going home." Ash stands up, extending a hand for Michael.
"No... I don't want to come over tonight. I kind of just want to go home." He says.
"Okay, do you want us to walk with you?" Ashton asks.
"Yeah... I guess." Michael gets up and Ashton starts walking towards Michael's house.
"I'm so excited, it's almost your birthday." I say as we turn into his street.
"Yeah. I can't believe it, I'm gonna be fifteen."
"You're getting old." I kid, giggling.
"Yeah, I am, actually, didn't think I was going to make it or something..." Michael says. "Well... Bye Soph. Goodnight." And with that, he turns and goes into his house.
"Bye." I say, leaving. His street with Ashton at my heels.
We walk home.
I get a snack, brush my teeth, change, and get into bed. I look at the sunset from my bed, glad that the school year is almost over, and maybe Michael will feel better in the summer, when we aren't in school and he won't see Jack D. and his clan of bullies.
I wonder what to get Michael for his birthday.
I have a dream about him.
"Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if I wasn't here." Michael says.
"Don't talk like that." I nudge him.
The next day, he isn't there. I can't find him.
Life is a blur.
I only hear screams.
Then I see my mom, and Michael.
I wake with a start.
I don't ever want what I saw in that dream to be real.
Michael's here, I know that.
I can hear the band practicing downstairs.
They're playing a new song, it's very sloppy and I hear Luke yelling "Shut up!" every few minutes when Calum starts talking.
I'm bored, so I take a nap.
I wake up to someone stroking my hair and singing softly:
"Haven't even seen the best o-" Michael stops singing when I sit up. "Oh, hey." He laughs.
"Hi. What time is it?" I giggle.
"Quarter past six. You're invited over to my place if you want." Michael laughs nervously.
"Why do you do that?" I ask.
"Do what?"
"Act all nervous."
"I don't."
"You do."
"I-I don't."
"Yeah you do, you just stuttered!"
"Well, nevermind. Do you want to hang out or not?"
"Absolutely, should I bring my bathing suit? Will we go swimming?"
"If you want, I mean we only have a week of school left until the holiday, it's warm enough."
"Yeah. And Christmas is coming in a month, what do you want?"
Michael smiles. "You'll find something without me telling you. And you've got to get me a birthday present first."
"Yeah, true. Sorry I can't come to your party."
"It's alright, I just would have more fun if you came."
"I can't believe you're going to be turning sixteen in 2011."
"Me either. I don't even know what I want to do as a job in high school, much less as a career. And school's almost over."
"Well, maybe the band'll get famous."
"That would be nice. Like, really nice." Michael laughs again, still sounding uneasy.
"Michael, is there something you aren't telling me?"
"No, no. Everything's fine, everything's good."
"Then why are you so nervous?"
"I'm not!"
"You are, see, your hands are all shaky and sweaty."
"Well, I.." He shakes his head.
"Spit it out!"
"No! I can't tell you!"
"You can. Say it now or forever hold your peace."
"It's speak now or forever hold your peace."
"Michael, we're not getting married." I retort.
"Ha ha, very funny." He rolls his eyes.
"Shut up." I nudge him with my elbow.
He laughs.
"One day will you get married?" He asks.
"One day. Is it hot in here, or is that just me?"
"No, it's hot." Michael fans himself with his hand and rolls up his sleeve.
"I'm sweating." I announce.
"Take off your sweatshirt." He suggests.
"I can't."
"Yes you can, take it off."
"I can't, I'm not wearing anything under it!"
"I don't give a shit!" Michael tugs my sweatshirt up.
I scream as he pulls my sweatshirt off my head and throws it to the floor.
The door opens with a bang.
Ashton starts yelling. "What the hell is going on?! Sophia, put your shirt back on!"
I fling my sweatshirt defiantly at Michael's face again. He screams, laughing, and jumps on my bed, grabbing a pillow.
"No shoes on my bed!" I scream as he smacks me with a pillow.
Ashton howls with laughter, and me and Michael stop fighting and glare at him.
"Get out." I say.
"I just came to check on you and you're having a nudist pillow fight." He snickers.
"How is it nudist, I'm wearing all my clothes except socks?" Michael asks.
"Yeah, and I'm still wearing clothes. Also, I'm using a jumper." I say.
"Whatever, just get a shirt on and go downstairs, or it's going to be two in the morning when you get to Michael's." Ashton laughs.