Before Everything Changed // The Outsiders

Chapter 9

Me and Pony spent a week up in Windrixville waiting for Dally to come up and when he did we immediately went out to eat. We were going to head back home to Tulsa because it was self defense. We went back to the abandoned church we were staying to find it on fire. Pony ran out the car to try and save the kids that were trapped in the fire. I went after him. We threw rocks through the wood covering the window to get in.

"Is that guy coming"
Pony yelled to me over all the noise.
"No"
I answered.
"Why to scared?"
"No to fat"
I answered he originally would of laughed but this was serious. We got all the kids out with Dally's help. I started rushing Pony to get out but he was too worried about me. I heard the crackling above and I could barely breath once Pony finally got out I tried to but I couldn't. I felt the roof collapse on me. My back snapped and I was under a bunch of burning wood. Dally dug me out. I was in so much pain I couldn't move. I heard the sirens and I felt people tending to my needs. The whole time I thought about everything I have ever known. Me and Pony had become so close in Windrixville and Laine and the gang I did have good things in my life but to many bad things. Abusive parents, murdering a Soc., Laine leaving, getting jumped by Soc.'s, and know so close to death. It could of been hours or days I don't remember but I believe it was more days the. Hours and I would stare at myself and think. I heard about the rumble when the boys had come to visit it was all my fault everyone was fighting. I remember seeing Dally and Pony walk through the door to my room.
"Hey john we beat the Soc.'s all the way back to there side of town"
Dally said walking in and bending down at the side of my bed. I hadn't been doing so good and I was close to death.
"Fighting ain't no good"
I said. I saw Dally's expression and couldn't read it.
"There still writing editorials about you in the paper were all real proud of you buddy"
He said finally. I was so happy I always wanted Dally to be proud of me.
"Ponyboy?"
I asked because I felt even closer to death. He bent down over next to me.
"Stay Gold Ponyboy, Stay Gold"
I said to him so light I thought he didn't hear. Everything started to go black. I heard Dally's voice he looked just like her I remember his words ragged and upset "wake up Johnny, c'mon Johnny don't die". I wanted to die though I had lost everything but then another part of me said don't die I had been struggling through depression when she had left maybe it was my turn to leave. My back was done for even if I did survive I wouldn't be able to walk again and my burns were so disturbing to the human eye people would never be able to look at me.

I wasn't dead but I knew something was wrong.