He makes me so happy but crushes me at the same time. We made a bet that I would kiss him at lunch. I won the bet. We were texting like usual but the next day he blocked me on everything. I cried for 3 days. Alex came by my group the day he blocked me and I was already in tears before he came since it was a bad day.
I looked him in his eyes as a tear slid down my face; he just looked away and started talking to a friend. The next day I tried talking to him asking why he blocked me without an explanation. He just said "Why do you want to know" then walked away.
I'm confused. I'm hurt. I had a dream the other night about Alex and woke up crying. I like to think everything happens for a reason but what's the reason. What's the lesson it's trying to teach.
I swiped up on his yolo and said I'm confused as shit. He replied to it so I swiped up again saying it didn't matter who it was but to know I m confused. He replied again saying to swipe up and talk to him so I replied "imaging being able to text you😂. Couldn't be me".
The next day on the bus I'm sitting alone and talking to my friend, whose on the seat beside me, and Alex sits behind me just to mess with me. He'll grab my hair or choke me(which I don't mind but that's not the point) or if I'm looking past him staring into space he will say something along the like of "why you gotta look at me?" I Just give him a blank stare or say shut up Alex.
There was another day where he sat behind me and I wasn't in a good mood and all I said was "I'm not dealing with your shit today."
I had leaned my head back on the chair with my eyes closed and I felt his hand on my head. It was like he was comforting me in a subtle way. I took his resting hand off my head and kinda hooked my fingers with his.
After a few minutes of that I looked at him and he asked if I felt better. The truth was I did and I told him that. As much as I try to dislike him, I can't Bc deep down I know that he's a good guy. He always puts himself down
I had a connection with him. I got him to open up to me a little bit.
Today's date is Saturday, January 4,2020. On January 6, we go back to school and I honestly can't wait to see what happens on the bus.
I hope everyone had a great winter break, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year
YOU ARE READING
My world and thoughts
HumorIf you are reading this, I sometimes just need to write down my feelings and get away from everything. I was going through this "book" when I realized that everything that happened to me was for a reason. I laugh at my feelings for what was going on...
