Voir Dire (N.H.)

twenty-one

Niall didn't know what brought him to be driving past Kelsey's apartment that afternoon. Maybe it was because he thought that seeing her or being reminded of her might help him decide what to do. Or maybe he thought it would help him forget her.

The meeting with Mr. Michaels had really shaken him. Suddenly he was questioning everything. His feelings for Kelsey, his decision to go through with the PR plan, even his music career. He knew what he should do, break things off with Kelsey like he was told and continue with his publicity stunt in order to release the album that he was so proud of. It seemed to be the decision that every thing was pointing to. It was the simple fix.

But if it was so simple, why was Niall so hesitant to do it? Why even with this feeling of betrayal, dishonesty, and overall, shock, did he not want to let Kelsey go? What was it about this girl that made him willing to put everything on the line for her? Niall needed an answer and he needed it soon.

He stared out his window at the tall brick building, studying it as if the architecture held the answer to the puzzle he was trying to solve. That's when he spotted her. The same chocolate brown hair falling several inches shorter. She stood at the door of the building, her lips forming the same worried line he'd seen on Kelsey a million times before. And even from a distance he knew who this was.

He whipped his phone out of his pocket before he even thought about what he was doing. She answered on the first ring.

"Kelsey, its your mother. She's here," he breathed quickly. His heart was beating faster than it should have, but maybe that was because he was about to hear Kelsey's voice for the first time in five days.

"What do you mean?" she answered, her voice confused. Niall could picture her sitting on the other end of the phone, her nose wrinkling up like it does when she just doesn't quite understand. Kelsey told him she had a bad habit of revealing her feelings through her face. But Niall didn't find it a bad habit at all.

"She's here. In LA. I just saw her outside your apartment."

"Why were you outside my apartment?"  This question comes out more interrogative, and Niall began to wonder if he had revealed too much by calling in the first place.

"That's not important," he quickly deflected. "I just wanted to give you a heads up because she's here in LA and she knows where you live. And I know we haven't spoken in a few days but I just wanted you to know, so you weren't blindsided." Suddenly, any part of him that was angry at Kelsey for applying for the PR job had vanished, and Niall just knew that he needed to be here for Kelsey. "And if you need a place to hide out or you don't want to see her.." Niall rambled.

"She's here... in LA," Kelsey repeated slowly, processing the words.

"Yes," Niall affirmed.

Kelsey was quiet for a moment. So quiet, that Niall began to wonder if maybe she had hung up on him.

"Kelsey?" he spoke again. "You still there?"

She sighed loudly. "Yes, just...thinking."

Niall stayed silent, padding his thumbs against the black leather of his steering wheel as he sat at the stoplight.

"Can I come over?" Kelsey half-mumbled, almost as if she was afraid to say it. "I don't think I'm ready to see her yet."

"'Course" Niall replied.

**********

When Kelsey arrived at Niall's house thirty minutes later, she was a mess. Not a sobbing, puddle of tears mess, but a shaking, verge of eruption, angry type of mess. The type of mess that she was almost sure wasn't going to help matters with Niall by any means.