Voir Dire (N.H.)

twenty-seven

Niall was hammered. More hammered than he'd ever been in recent memory. He was hammered and lonely, and that was a miserable combination.

It all started at the after party for the announcement of his tour. It was supposed to be a happy moment in Niall's life, but instead he'd never felt lower. He'd never felt lonelier. What should have been a celebration, an event to kick off his favorite part of being a musician in the first place, had once again become a reminder of the state of his emotions and a catalyst for drinking away his feelings.

It had been a month since Kelsey tore his heart apart. Yes, tore was the best way to describe it, because Niall wasn't sure there would ever be a way to stitch it back together again. He'd had his heartbroken before, but never like this. Never in a way he didn't see coming.

Usually, music was the one thing Niall could always count on getting him through his emotions. For Niall, music had always been the bandage to his open wounds, providing cover for him as he slowly healed. His past heartbreaks had produced some of his best songwriting and cured his broken heart in the process. But for some reason this time, every note sounded out of key, every lyric seemed inadequate and soon, he couldn't bring himself to play a single chord.

His songwriting wasn't the only thing suffering. Heartbreak had drifted into every aspect of his life. He'd found red carpet appearances unbearable, he struggled to make it through interviews, and his fans had been picking up on his lack of social media interactions. And then there was the Range Rover incident. A night when Niall's emotions got the better of him, so much so that he'd lost his focus on the road, resulting in him having to abruptly swerve to avoid hitting another vehicle. This, of course, resulted in his Range Rover meeting a large metal telephone pole. The scariest part of that night was that Niall didn't feel a thing. There was no adrenaline kicking in, no fight or flight response, his body stayed numb. And even a TMZ headline and a call from Alan Michaels asking what the hell was going on with him couldn't get Niall to care.

The only person that had kept Niall out of hitting full on disaster, Britney Spears circa 2017, was surprisingly- Krystal. She'd saved him a few too many times from being a drunken mess on the red carpet of an awards show. She'd shoved his drunk ass into limousines after their "dates", when Niall had downed tequila shots like they were juice instead of slowly sipping on wine. She'd answered interview questions with a smile, about their relationship, about music, about anything that Niall couldn't find the words to answer. She didn't know about things with Kelsey, not officially- but somehow she did. He was grateful for Krystal. Saving a heartbroken former boybander from a downward spiral wasn't part of her job.

And here she was again tonight, helping him find his way home after he had a few too many rounds of Guinness at the tour announcement party.

"Basil could have brought me home you know," Niall slurred, his bloodshot eyes meeting Krystal's in the backseat of the Uber. Niall wouldn't admit it, but he was happy that it wasn't Basil driving him home again. He wasn't sure he could deal with another one of Basil's attempts to find out just what exactly was driving his star client to rock bottom.

"I know," Krystal replied, the glitter in her eyeshadow catching in a passing street light. "But I wanted to make sure you got back." She offered Niall a soft smile.

Niall gave her an appreciative nod, then leaned his head back, resting it between the black leather seat and the window. His eyes grew tired, and he closed them in an effort to stop the world from spinning. He'd only passed out a few minutes before he hears Krystal's hushed voice next to him.

"I told you, I can't tonight. I had a prior commitment," she whispered, her tone laced with irritation.

Niall couldn't make out the words being said on the other end of the phone. But from what his altered mind could comprehend, the person on the other and was yelling. He opened his eyes, squinting in attempt to alter the blurred image of Krystal in front of him.