Saved By Love

Chapter 2: Ken's Tears

"I don't like surprises. What in the Digiworld are you two and Yamato planning?" Ken was sitting on one of the many building blocks in Primary Village. He was glaring hard at the two digimon. Wormmon and Gabumon shifted uncomfortably under Ken's glare. Wormmon and Gabumon were given specific instruction not to spill the plan to Ken. They were in charge, by Yamato's order, to keep him busy until Yamato arrived.

"I'm sorry Ken-chan." Wormmon's eyes were filled with emotions. "It's just that...you were so broken and fragile ever since your... your..." Wormmon's words trailed off; not sure what to say; not wanting to say them.

"My father... my papa... the man who hurt me." Ken supplied quietly. His eyes soften in love and understand toward the two digimon. The man who beat me and tried to kill me; the man who would not accept me as me, Ken sadly thought.

He remembered that day very well but he would not change his confession that day, even if he could. He loved Yamato back then and he still loves him now. He would not change a thing. Even if it meant being beaten and disowned by the man he called his father.

"Yes, him." Wormmon confirmed. "Ever since that day you became a shell of yourself. You would not talk, eat, or sleep. You were always afraid. I was so scared! I was so scared that I lost you forever Ken-chan! I love you so much! I never want to see you that hurt or sad again." Tears were now falling freely from Wormmon's eyes. "It hurt so much, Ken-chan! I failed to protect you! It's my fault that you were attacked. I should have stopped him! It's my fault that you tried to kill yourself. It's my fault that your whole world fell apart! It's mine fault that you can't be around people without having a full-blown panic attack or flashback. If only I protected you sooner, then none of this would have happened." Wormmon sobbed as he revealed to Ken all the shame, guilt, and blame he has been feeling for months since Ken's attack and everything that happened after that.

Ken felt his heart starting to hurt when Wormmon blurted what was bothering him. Ken knew that Wormmon blamed himself for him becoming the Digimon Kaiser, all those years ago. Ken still felt awful and guilty about what happen, but he no longer beats himself over it. He managed to turn his life around and even forgiven himself for it.

Now, three years later, he's back in that hole. But this time it's not out of guilt from hurting innocent digimon, no this time it's from fear. Fear of the man he called papa; fear of being attacked by him again. This fear was so overwhelming that he couldn't sleep or eat. He even tried to commit suicide, even though he didn't want to; he knew it was wrong. He didn't want to hurt himself; he didn't want to hurt his friends but he couldn't stop himself. It, literally, took the combine efforts of his boyfriend, Yamato, and his best friend, Daisuke, to knock him out of the trance he was in and helped him get to the road of recovery. Ken felt very grateful to have Yamato, Daisuke, and Wormmon in his life. If it wasn't for them coming to his aid he, probably, might not be here today.

It had been a struggle to get his life back together. He was slowly getting there. He was slowly healing from the damage that was caused by his father. Ken was actually very happy now then he was just a few months ago. But this didn't stop his little bug for blaming himself for the events that caused Ken's world to shatter into a million pieces.

Wormmon blamed himself for things that weren't even his fault. Sure, Wormmon was his protector and friend but even he couldn't protect him from papa's unexpected attack. Wormmon was in Ken's room at the time. Ken figured that Wormmon couldn't have gotten to him any sooner than he had since the door was closed; which turned out to be a challenge for his digimon. However, Wormmon did save him in the end.

Ken sighed inwardly knowing that Wormmon still blamed himself for not being able to protect him in time and for his almost successful suicide attempt. Ken told Wormmon a million times that none of this was his fault. That none of them could have prevented the turn of events.