The Darkest Star

Chapter 20: Andromeda Walburga Black

          it was cold, a burning piercing cold, the kind that settles into your bones and is always there. the date, June, 30, the time 1:07 AM. I was stood at the edge of the black lake. I stood still. my wand in my hand, one of my swords in the other. the black fabric of my dress, my gift from Bella, swaying in the wind. my boots making me appear even taller than I already am. I had multiple knives stored in my clothing, my boots, dress pockets etc.  I stared at my reflection in the glassy water, I had been training all night in preparation for tomorrows events, tomorrow we would finally be rid of that old fuck. Voldemort still refused to let me do it.

~~~~flashback~~~~

          I sat at the table of the Malfoy manor with Bella on my left and Narcissa on my right, Lucius, Dolohov, Yaxley, greyback, Pettigrew and Severus, Nagini was sliding around the floor behind us. Voldemort was sat at the head of the table. I transformed into my snake and slid next to Nagini up to Voldemort Nagini wrapped around him, I transformed back to myself.

          "My lord, I have a request" he looked at me and my cunning smile

         "what is it, child?" he spoke in a bored tone

          "I want to do it. I want to kill him" he hissed slightly

          "We have been over this, your cousins need to prove their loyalty, you already have"

          "ugh, I'm just so bored of these simple missions, kill this muggle, torture her, kidnap him, and trust me I take pride in my tasks, I do, they're just so simple, my lord"

         "are we not exciting enough for the great Andromeda Black." he said dully "might I remind you we have all of your family's locations"

          "They have no meaning to me, I don't give two shits if you kill them" I deadpanned

          "even you precious little Weasley," he said coyly

         "You lay a finger on him, I don't care who you are I will not hesitate to murder you in your sleep" I hissed he smiled having uncovered my weakness

         "whatever" I stood and left

~~~~end of flashback~~~~

          I sat down placing my wand in the sand, what have I become? a bloodthirsty monster. I can barely remember who I am some days. I conjured up my record player and started playing green day. 

I walk a lonely road, the only one that I have ever known

          a tear fell from my eye, I sat still, unable to move even if I wanted to

I don't know where it goes, but it's only me and I walk alone.

          I quickly wiped it away, I cry too much, it shows too much vulnerability.

I walk this empty street on the boulevard of broken dreams Where the city sleeps

          I tried to smile, something I don't think I've ever genuinely done, I physically couldn't

And I'm the only one, and I walk alone I walk alone, I walk alone I walk alone and I walk a

          I dropped my head in despair.

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me, y shallow heart's the only thing that's beating

          everything is falling apart around me and I can't stop it, I am no longer in control.

Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me

Till then I walk alone

          I grabbed the needle no longer able to listen. I usually can never stop a song in the middle, music is my way of comprehending how I'm feeling and right now, it's not working. I don't know what to do anymore, or how to fix this mess I've gotten into. if the things my life revolves around can no longer help me what the fuck can! I was hyperventilating in a panic, I stood quickly running back to the castle, I looked at my watch every five minutes.

          1:56

          2:02

          2:06

          2:14 I ran into the castle to my dorm, shaking Ly awake.

           "wake the fuck up, wake the fuck up, fucking bastard wake up!" she started to stir

           "what the hell do you want?" she hissed tired

           "I um- I think I need a- a " she raised her eyebrows, I gagged at what I was about to do "I need a hug" I blurted out, she looked at me absolutely shocked, she grabbed her wand

          "who the fuck are you," she said, she lit up the room with her wand

           "you know what just forget I said anything" I started to walk away when she grabbed my wrist, pulling me into a hug she wrapped her arms around me, I stiffened up on instinct she grabbed my arms one by one, moving them so I was hugging her too. I sniffed starting to cry again

          "andy, um are you- are you crying?"

           "no" I sniffed "maybe" after I had calmed down we both went to sleep, well ly did. my mind kept racing through lyrics of my unfinished melody.

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the borderline of the edge
And where I walk alone read between the lines
What's fucked up and every thing's all right
Check my vital signs to know I'm still alive
And I walk alone I walk alone, I walk alone
I walk alone and I walk aMy shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
Till then I walk alone I walk alone, I walk aI walk this empty street
On the boulevard of broken dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one, and I walk alone My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
Till then I walk alone

~~~~

          I ran to the seventh floor, heels clicking my hair whipped my face, my aunts dress flowing behind me. I entered the filthy mess of a room quickly finding the cabinet. it took a while without ly there but soon enough Bellatrix stepped out, wow it's no wonder where I get my dramatics from. she hugged me awkwardly.

          "ah, I see you got my little gift"

          "yes! I'm quite fond of it" I twirled around playing with the fabric Dolohov stepped out next, we nodded to each other.

         "Andromeda, you are to find the potter boy and distract him" I scoffed

          "Why do I always get the boring tasks!"

          "Just you wait once we win this war, we'll have everything Andromeda, just you wait. now go" Dolohov commanded us, we looked at each other both of us grinning madly, I let out a little laugh before running off, Bella right on my heels. both of us laughing madly, cursing students and teachers, the terrified looks on their petrified faces. once we had come upon the astronomy tower I stopped looking one last time at my aunt. she nodded

        "do it" I smiled and raced up the stairs.