The 100 Girls One Shots

Blodreina OctaviaxReader

A/N

Sorry I've been gone so long!

Also this one is sad boi hours if you want to skip...suicide warning. You have been warned. 

Y/N's POV

It has been 5 years trapped in this underground bunker. The door won't open. People are starting to lose all hope. I have witnessed my friends die, been forced to eat them for my own survival, and have seen my former closest friend turn into a monster. Octavia...now 'blodreina'...'the red queen'. 

I miss our walks to the butterfly field when we first arrived on earth. I miss learning how to throw a knife with her when the grounders first started attacking. I miss her smile, her hand on my shoulder when I was lost as I saw the 100 descend into chaos, her calming voice telling me everything was going to be alright. I miss her. Octavia is gone, I do not know where she went. Now there is only Blodreina. 

Sometimes I think I can see remnants of O in Blodreina's eyes, a glimmer of vulnerability as her gaze meets mine and what I might mistake for...sadness? For a moment I wonder if she misses me, if she will finally stop to talk to me in the dining hall, if she will let me in again. 

But I know now that things will never be the same as I walk briskly down the hall to my room, I know that I can not be here anymore. A tear threatens to spill down onto my cheek as I reach the door to my quarters. I have just gotten back from leaving a note at Oct- The Red Queens door. Normally someone would not be allowed to get that close to her without facing severe consequences, but Indra was on guard and she has a soft spot for me, she remembers when I was Octavia's light in the darkness. The note did not say much, I don't want my exit to be dramatic and pitiful, it was only meant as a reminder for O, one last attempt to get her to remember who she once was. This is what it said:

O, 

I'm really sorry to leave you in a time so harsh. I know you will get our people through this, you are a strong leader. Just remember, you are an even stronger friend. Please don't forget how we got here, where we come from. Don't forget the 100. Don't forget the Octavia who chased butterflies and survived man eating snakes. Don't forget us. 

Stay strong, and may we meet again. Ai gonplei ste odon. 

Y/n. 

Octavia's POV

My hands trembled as I read the note that was left at my door. A tear escaped my eye and dropped onto the crumpled up parchment as I reread the last line hoping I had missed something, anything, that would change the circumstance this seemed to be leading to. I did not miss anything....Y/n was going to kill herself...and it is all my fault. 

I quickly wipe the tears from my eyes and put on a face that masked weakness, I turned around and looked at Indra, only she would be able to see past this facade. "Y/n," I began, "we need to stop her". Indra nodded in understanding and we dashed down the corridors, people moving out of my way in alarm, in fear of being prosecuted for standing in the way of Blodreina. 

However the only anger I held in me now was for myself. I had shut her out for 5 years. 5 years! I was merely afraid she would bring me back into the light again, I was afraid of being saved, of showing weakness. So I kept her at a distance, pretended she did not exist, pretended we never existed. She must think I felt nothing over the loss of our friendship..or whatever our relationship was, with my stone cold demeanor. However I thought of her every day, and it hurt so much when our eyes would meet in the dining hall, or as I watched over the fighting pit. It hurt so much to see a look of betrayal and hurt on her face. I wanted so badly to run over to her in those moments and apologize for being so cruel to her over the years but I would never forgive myself. I simply thought it was too late to turn back now. I believed I was saving her the trouble of not having to deal with me any longer. But now I have truly screwed up, she is broken because of me, I never meant for any of this. 

Y/n's POV

I took out the line of rope from my closet hastily, threw it over a beam on the ceiling, and fastened a knot. I don't exactly know why I was hurrying I didn't really expect anyone to be running after me to try and stop me. I dragged a chair over from the corner of the room and hopped up onto it. I pulled the already formed noose over my head and tightened it. I whispered one sentence before I kicked the chair out from under me, "I love you Octavia". 

With that swift movement, my body started to involuntarily fight the process of suffocation that was occurring. I felt my airway close off and my arms and legs start to convulse from the lack of oxygen from the brain. I lost all sense of time and my head felt extremely heavy. The world soon faded to black and my body went limp. The only sensation left was a slight tingling in my fingers.

Octavia's POV

As We reached Y/n's door I took in a sharp breath, I did not know what to expect of my dear friend on the other side. I never got the chance to tell her everything I've been dying to tell her. And then I opened the door. My jaw dropped and a choked sob escaped my lips, my eyes blurred and the worst pain I have felt since Lincoln over came me. She was hanging from the ceiling limp...I was too late. 

"Octavia, look!" Indra snapped me out of my cries. My head snapped up to see a twitch of y/n's hand. There was still time. I quickly ran to her and unsheathed my sword from behind me, I sliced through the rope that suspended y/n and she hit the floor, unmoving. Indra hurried to untie the rope around her neck and I cupped her face begging her to breathe. 

"Come on y/n/n, come on y/n. Stay with me, please. Breathe! Breathe god damn it!" I cried over her stiff body. As one last attempt, I tilted her head back and sucked in large breath. I connected my mouth to hers and transferred the air hoping to whatever God might be out there she would live. Nothing. I tried one more time waiting for her to cough and sputter or show any sign that life was restored into her weak body. Nothing. 

Suddenly Abby Griffin comes barging through the door. "I'm here, I heard what happened." She looks shocked but determined as she races to Y/n's side, "Alright y/n I need you to stay with me please just a little longer, we're going to get your heart back beating". Abby takes out what looks like a defibrillator from her bag and rips the front of y/n's shirt open. She starts attaching the ends of wires on sticker things to her chest and asks Indra and I to not touch her. I understand and Abby presses something on the machine. 

Y/n's body jolts and my eyes widen with fear, "Abby-"

"This is to start her heart again, it doesn't always work the first time" She reassured me. A tear rolled down my face but I nodded without protesting. 

Abby pressed the button again, y/n's body violently jolted again. Nothing, again....

Abby looked at me in a way to say sorry, fear evident in her eyes at my reaction. 

"Again!" I shouted, "Do it again! Save her!"

"Octavia I don't-"

"Abby! Again!" I demanded. She pressed the button one last time...nothing. 

I let out a wail that I was sure the whole hallway could hear. My y/n was gone. I clutched her hands and buried my face on her shoulder, "Yu gonplei ste odon". I muttered. Indra and Abby looked down, sorrowful. 

Y/n's POV     -A/n: had to do it to ya lol

My eyes flickered open to a strange sight. Indra and Abby sat next to me with their heads down, Octavia (Octavia! Oh my god!) had her head in my shoulder, crying over my body. I was sprawled out on the floor with a defibrillator attached to me...Oh my god. I almost died. I tried to kill myself. 

"Yu gonplei ste odon" Octavia murmured into my ear. 

A grin spread on my face, "no it's not". I said. 

Octavia's head snapped up to look at me, her eyes wide with shock, tears spilling from them. "Y/n!" she cries out. Indra and Abby look happily surprised

"I'm back bitches" I cried, my voice cracking a bit at the end. Octavia engulfed me in a tight hug, for the first time in a long time, I did not see Blodreina in her at all.