Always - Sequel to Stay Together For The Kids

Trust.

"I can't let him go, Lily." Ashton's eyes stare at the table, but my eyes glare at him.

"And hanging Calum for his death will bring him back?" I spit.

I'm so angry. I don't know where it's come from. I just think of Michael, unknowing that he was never going to see his daughter again. I think of Calum's voice cracking whenever he says Michaels name.

No. I know Calum like the back of my hand. And I know Calum loved Michael.

"It just looks suspicious." Ashton pipes up.

"What about us, Ashton?" I yell. I kick my seat from beneath me and stand up. "You show up after Michael gets murdered and hook up with his wife! Maybe it was you!"

I can feel myself starting to cry. I hate saying Michaels name with the word 'murdered' directly after. And I hate thinking that maybe what I said could be true.

"You know I would never-" Ashton says with a slightly shocked expression.

"And I know that Calum would never, either!" I yell.

"If you're so worried that I killed Michael, I'll pack my bags and you won't have to see me again." Ashton retorts, standing up too.

I'm taken aback at this. And stare at him for a second. "Fine. Get out." I spit.

Ashton looks just as surprised at my response. "Lily." Ashton says fiercely.

I ignore him, walking away from him. I cross my arms across my chest, trying to tame the pain.

Why the fuck was this so hard? Why did this hurt so much? Ashton had made me so happy lately. Now everything felt, undone.

I walk into my room, and instinctively check on Ruby. She is still peacefully sleeping, and I'm glad she didn't wake to the yelling.

I close my eyes as I remember the yelling. God, I really don't want Ash to leave. I don't know what I would do without him to be honest.

But I couldn't forgive the words he said. The disdain and anger in his voice. His vindication against Calum. It was painful to even think of.

I curl up on my bed, sitting crossed legged, running a hand through my hair.

Come back, Michael. Figure this all out for me.

I look up as I hear movement at the doorway, and I see Ashton resting against the doorframe.

"I'm sorry." He murmurs, shaking his head. I see the pain in his eyes as he watches over me. I know he is sorry. I just don't know if I forgive him.

"I won't believe Calum killed Michael!" I choke out. I shake my head. "I can't believe it."

Ashton moves forward to the bed, and I don't have the willpower to tell him to go away anymore.

The bed moves down slightly as he sits down next me to me, wrapping his arms around me.

Without even thinking about it, as an instinct, I rest my head in his shoulder.

"I was just looking for an answer." Ashton says softly.

I nod, not really able to talk right now.

"I just get so angry with Michael sometimes." Ash breathes. "I'm so angry he left with so many things unanswered. And every day I'm wondering whether I could of done something different. What the hell happened in those last moments."

I can feel Ashton's hands shake lightly against my body and I honestly feel sorry for him. He's fighting the same battle we all are.

"Everyone's wondering the same thing." I manage to say. "Even Calum." I say pointedly.

Ashton looks down to me, his eyes betraying the guilt and regret I know he feels.

"I'm so sorry." He says quietly. "You know I didn't mean to upset anyone."

I pause. Did I? "I just don't think Michael would of wanted his best friends fighting like this." I say.

"I know." Ashton nods. "I'll call Luke in the morning."

"What about Cal?" I ask, looking up to Ash with a frown.

"Cal can wait." Ashton says quietly, pulling me closer to him. "I need to fix something else first."

Ashton leans down and kisses me on the forehead. He lingers his mouth there for a second, and I feel his hot breath on my head.

It softens my face a little and the tears on my cheek seem to glide away more.

"Do you really want to leave?" I whisper to him, closing my eyes.

Ashton leans his forehead down onto mine. "Do you really think I killed him?" Ash whispers back.

I shake my head.

Ashton shakes his. "You've got your answer then."

I flicker my eyes open and see his golden ones staring back at me.

They look sad, worried, but above all, hurt. And I know that he really never meant to hurt me.

I lean forward and lightly kiss his lips, only giving him a fleeting second for him to kiss me back before I pull away.

Ashton pauses before resting his head back down to mine, frowning.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"I think I went to say those three words I really shouldn't say." He admits, biting his lip.

I shake my head. "Don't say them." I say. "Not yet."

Ashton nods, still biting his lip.

I run my hand over his lip. "Don't bite your lip." I tell him.

Ashton frowns again. "Why?"

"I'm trying to be mad at you." I smile slightly. "It makes it hard when you're attractive."

Ashton smiles sheepishly. "You know I really do care about you?" He says.

I nod. "I know. I care about you too." I tell him.

Ashton grins, leaning his body into mine.

I hear Ruby stir from the other side of the room, and I hope I don't have to get up. From the exhaustion of today, of all the events and anger, everything seems to be ok again.

And I realise that I really do care about this boy wrapping his arms around me. So much so, maybe one day I might say those three words I probably shouldn't say.

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I'm sorry that I've been really slack with updating lately, I went to Soundwave on the weekend, which is this music festival in Australia, by the way.

Anyway, I worked there and met Gerard Way and I cried and told him I loved him and I pretty much had the most amazing weekend of my entire life.

But I am really sorry I haven't updated recently. 😞😞