Golden Era (Book 2)

58. Try Not to Fall in Love

The night sky darkened by a few more degrees when Atobe left his lawyer's office. Hours of legal consultation on a strategy against the Ikedas left him drained. Surrounded by the soft quietness of the night, he allowed exhaustion to take over. He'd been working without a break since the fundraiser started and recent scandals only added to his pressure. In a rare moment of solitude, he was finally able to relax.

Atobe considered taking a stroll along the river to get back to his hotel. Right as he neared the waterfront walkway, he spotted someone pacing under the streetlamp. At the sight of red hair, Atobe stopped short.

"Your promiscuous friend told me you'd be here," said Noa in a lukewarm voice.

Knowing she was referring to none other than Oshitari Yuushi—the man with an endless rotation of girlfriends, Atobe instantly felt himself smile.

He allowed himself to indulge in hopeful thinking as he approached her. Up close, he saw that Noa's hair was tied up to reveal her sweat-glistened forehead. Replacing her stiff blouses and trousers were a zip hoodie and a pair of joggers.

"Isn't it a little late for a run?" he asked.

Noa shrugged. "I like running in the dark." She paused, then said, "Plus, I had to think."

"I hope it's about me."

Noa rolled her eyes: it was just like Atobe Keigo to think the world revolved around him. Laced in this mild annoyance was also the sound of her heart coming back to life. She supposed it was a sign that she wasn't mistaken in coming.

"Am I right?" Atobe persisted.

"Would I even be human to not think about you after today's stunt?" retorted Noa. Expelling a sigh, she placed a hand on her hip, "In any case, I didn't come here to bicker with you. I came here because I've got something to say."

"I'm listening."

"Good—you should listen up because I'm only going to say this once."

Atobe nodded.

Dropping her hand, she linked them together to form a fist. Forehead creased and eyes downcast, she looked as if she was about to enter capital punishment. "I'm sorry I haven't been a good person."

Caught off guard, Atobe found himself choking to get out a response. But none came.

"This whole business with Ikeda Mai never had to blow up. I let it happen because I jumped to conclusions. Worse, it's because I purposefully jumped to conclusions."

"I don't understand."

"Of course you don't," she said. "It's my head, after all, not yours."

Again, Atobe wanted to smile at her directness but refrained, mindful to not spoil this moment.

"I never thought I'd tell you this, but here I am telling you anyway." She went on speaking in a hushed voice, "Since we started dating, a part of me was waiting and even wanting for catastrophe to break out. It scared me when I think about how we conveniently met again and again. I didn't believe wonderful things—such as being pursued and coddled—would happen to me. I'm used to being cast aside and looking out for myself. It's even worse when this pursuit came from you. In my head, it was all too perfect to be true—something had to go wrong."

Sucking in a deep breath, Noa's voice quivered here, "So when Ikeda Mai showed up, I was more reassured than agonized. What a relief to know I was right!"

"In other words," said Atobe quietly, "you were looking for a way out all along."

"Yes—that's how terrible I am." Eyes still glued to the ground, she said, "Ayuna asked me why I never questioned Ikeda Mai's motives. I couldn't tell her that I didn't want to question it. If not her, I'd eventually latch onto some other excuse."