Golden Era (Book 2)

13. Pretty Ugly

Ayuna froze. She wanted to scream and run, yet failed to do either A million thoughts cycled through her mind and the instinctive response that escaped her was, "You got the wrong person."

"No way!" declared Eiji. "You're definitely Hanamachi Ayuna!"

Placing two hands on her shoulders, he shook her back and forth like she was a broken puppet and shouted at the top of his lungs, "Ayuna, it's me, Kikumaru Eiji! Don't you remember me?!"

Instead of answering, Ayuna avoided eye-contact and fought to pry his hands off of her.

Eiji held on. There was no mistaking those eyes: they were iridescent, still as water and clear as the day. She was the girl that swept in and stole everyone's heart.

"Why aren't you looking at me?" he implored. "Why don't you say something? We're friends, aren't we? Don't you remember our time at Seigaku—"

His onslaught of questions brought on paroxysms of pain. Finally wrangling herself out of Eiji's clutch, Ayuna said, "I don't know what you're saying. You've got it wrong—"

Eiji took a step back, his face pinched. "Is that so? Did you forget about all of us? Does that mean you've also forgotten about Fuji Shuusuke—"

The mention of Fuji made Ayuna shudder. Blood rushing to her ears, she staggered back several steps and started to back away. Before Eiji had a chance to catch her again, Ayuna turned on her heels and darted down the stairs.

Eiji went after her, taking several steps at a time. He was certain Ayuna was no match for his speed. Yet by the time he reached the foyer, it was vacant: Ayuna had vanished.

"You can't be serious..." Eiji huffed in exasperation, running a hand through his disheveled hair. It was a replay of the past, her sudden appearance and disappearance.

Soon, he heard footsteps coming from the staircase. Whirling around, he found Ayuri halfway down, a hand on the banister and her expressions inscrutable.

Her calmness only fueled the fire inside of Eiji. Calm down calm down calm down, chanted Eiji frantically to himself. But it was no use: the top of his head threatened to blow off.

"You!" Eiji charged up to her. "You have a lot of explaining to do!"

"Explaining for what?"

"Why was Hanamachi Ayuna in your office?!" he demanded, his eyes bulging. "Do you two know each other?!"

"I don't know any Hanamachi Ayuna," replied Ayuri evenly, looking him in the eye. "I do know a Kamiya Ayuna."

"Kamiya?" Eiji felt like his eyeballs were going to pop out of their sockets. "Are you two related?"

"We are."

"She's your... cousin? Sister? What?"

"Ayuna's my younger sister."

It took a moment for shock then realization to sink in. Narrowing his eyes at her placid expressions, Eiji said, "I'm assuming you didn't just find out about a sister today."

"No."

"So you've deliberately hidden this from me and Fuji this entire time."

Ayuri said nothing. She tapped a finger against the banister, almost as a sign of guilty admission.

"You knew Fuji's story and you knew we were looking for Ayuna," Eiji bit down on each word with force. "You knew how important she was to Fuji, yet you hid the truth anyway."

"I had my reasons."

"What are they?! What's so damn important?!"

"I can't tell you," answered Ayuri flatly. "It's none of your business."

The frosty edge in her voice cut him. Eiji scrutinized the golden girl in front of him. The warmth that once colored her face was replaced by apathy and distance. What came after was the dismal realization that Fuji had been right and that Kamiya Ayuri wanted something from them. No wonder she appeared so interested in Fuji: she wanted his backstory with Ayuna.

This chilling insight nauseated Eiji. He thought of the violets he'd dropped upstairs and pictured petals falling when they hit the floor. Mere moments ago, he was fantasizing a future with her as a couple, wandering through the Kyoto streets in autumn. Not only was that dream pulverized and his ideals crushed, but he was also deluded—he was used.

"Is this why you were friendly to me and Fuji?" asked Eiji in a whisper. As he asked these questions, the center of his chest began to hurt enormously like it was being perforated by a drill.

The heartbreak in his voice was palpable and his sadness so concrete that they weighed down the entire room. Ayuri wanted to tell Eiji that while that was her initial intent, she started to develop feelings for him after a summer together. 

In the end, she chose to keep silent because she was a Masa. She was royalty, an elite, and more importantly, an immortal. She was not allowed to succumb to emotions.

"That's right. I needed answers and I've got them," said Ayuri steadily. "I'm grateful for you and your friend's help, and I'm sorry that you've become so invested."

"That apology's meaningless and you know it!" Eiji thundered. He wanted to say more but he could no longer find words. His lungs were filled with sludge and the air around him grew thin. He had never felt so awful in his life.

"I don't know what else to say, except that I'm sorry."

Eiji shook his head. All this time, he believed Ayuri was genuinely interested in him as a person. As summer deepened, he even started to believe that they might overcome status barriers and personal differences... Little did he know that he was being thoroughly fooled. He might as well have spent the summer blindfolded.

"I really thought you were different," he said. "I thought you were an actual human being and not one of those fake political puppets."

Jabbing a finger at her, he went on, "But you turned out worse than all of them combined. You fool people with your pretty face and deceive people with your fake interest... All this prettiness is just a disguise for your ugly personality. You're the biggest crook of them all!"

Without waiting for a response, Eiji stomped down the stairs and stormed out, shutting the door behind him with an earth-shattering slam.

After Eiji left, Ayuri stood where she was for a long time. She tried to separate herself from the lingering vibration and the floor that seemed to be crumbling beneath her feet.

She had two regrets.

One, she had let her relationship with Ayuna slip. The secret was out. Given Eiji's heightened emotions, Heaven knew how he'd deliver this information bomb to Fuji. From there, she could only foresee chaos.

Two, she'd allowed herself to philander with him for too long. She was playing a dangerous game and she should've predicted their eventual fallout. Only now did she see the risk of being with a mortal, as Masayuki had warned. Mortals knew how to sink a hook into one's mind and fish out the most unmanageable longing and desires. 

For the second reason, Ayuri was grateful that it blew up in her face. Better Eiji hating her than having to meet an end as awful as her mother's.