His Weapon - Book 1 [Z.M]

XLVII

In the end
We'll all
Become
Stories. . .
- Anca

I know Nicholas had a lot to say but remained silent for my sake. I took a quick shower, using every product I could lay my hands on— Every single one smelled like him and it was kind of comforting.
He was being super gentle, a side of him I didn't know existed to that extent. He ordered Chinese food and we were currently curled up on the couch waiting.
I had stuffed my mouth with soo much food in Nany's kitchen but I could still eat more. Sometimes when I'm stressed or angry, I eat more than my poor body can handle.

Nicholas' presence has calmed me down. I was internally grateful that he was around to take me away when I desperately needed to leave. I couldn't afford to look Zayn in the eyes after what I saw. I needed at least a few hours to think and calm myself down.
I had a lot of thinking to do and it had to be before tomorrow. I needed to figure out what step to take next and I needed to make up my mind.
I wasn't remotely even sure Zayn would still want to be with me at that point but do I still want to be with him?
Do I really want to be with a man who is head over heels in love with another who so happens to love him right back? I totally don't have it in me to take that away from them. If the odds ever rule in favor of Zayn denying his heart and sticking with me, in the long run he'd fucking hate me.
Fuck it wouldn't be my fault but he will blame me for every damn reason why they couldn't be together. Even if otherwise, I saw the way he looked at her— I saw his decision in his eyes and even if he tries to deny it; he wants her soo bad.

Nicholas wiggled the remote in front of my face, a slight frown forming on his perfectly sculptured face.
"What's it going to be?"
I snatched it with a roll of my eyeballs. I was in a deadly mood and he has been on the receiving end.
"I really don't give a fuck."
I muttered and he chuckled.
I settled for a movie which name I can't even remember. About ten minutes in the food had arrived and we ate in silence— I was emotionally suffocating the shit out of him.
"I don't know what he did back there, but I swear if he fucking laid a hand on y—"
He said, his gaze boring holes into my head and it snapped up when the picture was clearer.
"What? No."
Zayn would never lay a finger on me. I've seen him at his angriest but not once did he take out his vexation on me.
Seconds probably turned into minutes before he tore his gaze away from mine.
"—He'd never hit me."
I added just so he would never dare to think of Zayn in such a light again. I felt like it was my duty to defend him.
We were sat Indian style, facing each other on the couch as we demolished our chinese takeout.

He nodded in understanding and began to eat like nothing had happened but now I wanted to talk.
"He kissed her."
I blurted and his head snapped in my direction. Nicholas breathed out awkwardly. Did he really want to be here with me? He must've wanted to have an alone time with Kimberly as well but I took that away from him.
"I'm sorry."
I added, looking at any and everything but him. I felt his soft palm on my thigh and finally looked at him.
"I wouldn't give up being with you for anything in the world. And please don't let what you saw make you feel like you aren't enough because you are. Zayn is just soo fucking stupid to see it but I see it."
His hand was caressing my jaw at that point before he pulled away at the completion of his words. I sent him a smile, tears threatening to falls but I wasn't going to let that happen. I felt soo fucking weak and vulnerable, it sickened me.
"Do you love her too?"
I was dying to know. There was a large part of me that would lose it but I wouldn't be surprised. She's the definition of the word beautiful— she's absolutely stunning.
"In a different way, yes I do."
For a while I didn't answer, I placed my food on the table and just fiddled with my fingers, my eyes locked on it. From the corner of my eyes I saw Nicholas do the same with his food.
"I always loved Kimberly like a sister. We were actually inseparable; her, Zayn and I. Alberto always disliked her tho."
He chuckled at the last part which made me smile.
"How did you guys meet her?"
I asked a shallow question because of fear he wouldn't answer if it required too much information.
"In Zayn's childhood house. We just saw this weird girl binging through the fridge."
His smile was wide as he reminisced. I was way beyond interested.
"Obviously I was alarmed but Zayn was mesmerized. He had an instant crush on her." He rolled his eyes and I laughed at his outburst. Nicholas is soo fucking charming— just everything about him. However, the last thing I wanted to hear about was how Zayn immediately fell at her feet and worshiped her like the queen that she is.
I didn't show my discomfort though, I wanted him to keep talking.
"From that day forward she visited frequently to help Nany out. . . That was it."
He shrugged, putting both hands on either side of my thighs and pulling me closer to him.
"Nany?"
My brows furrowed but Nicholas didn't catch on, he was too busy pulling me.
"Yeah, her grandma," I was very close to him now and I literally gasped. Nany? Kimberly's grandma? How in the world does she genuinely like me soo much if I'm the one in the way of her grandchild's happiness— That explains why Kimberly was there.