Alone

Five

I got to the compound and pulled my mask off. The first person I saw is Nat. They stopped me before I could see anyone. "Listen, the fire spread to your room. I was able to contain the damage to only your bathroom, with that Tony was in there searching for anything needing to be replaced..." Nat trailed off. "He found the needles huh? How fucked am I?" She shrugged. "You heard how tense Cap was, imagine seeing your husband basically lose his shit. You're going to need to tell someone." I groaned. "Peter Benjamin Parker!" Tony's voice echoed through the lobby. "Could I possibly run?" I started to step back, only to hit someone. "I don't think so kid." I turned and smiled nervously. "Hey Cap...how are things?" He rose an eyebrow and grabbed my wrist. "Drugs? Do you realize how dangerous that is? You're putting your life at risk and.." I cut him off, "Did you think to read the vial it came with? That could tell you a lot. And I put my life at risk more everyday." Cap stopped at the charred lab doors.

He pushed me through and I stumbled, managing not to hit the floor. "Way to treat me like the bad guy Steve." Cap rose an eyebrow intimidatingly. He hated when I called him Steve. I faced Tony, he held up a needle and a vial of testosterone. I held up my hands. "Hey before you freak out, I can explain. That's not anything bad. It's medicine." Tony tossed me the vial. "Look, I made Jarvis lock this away. When I first arrived he took a body scan and asked me if I knew of the extra hormone running through my system. I was confused at first, but he said I had low levels of estrogen. Which of course I knew about." Tony narrowed his eyes. "Why would you have estrogen in your body?" I held up the vial. "This is testosterone, Nat injects me with it every month. Tony I have estrogen in my body because I was originally born a female." Tony's face softened and he uncrossed his arms. "Why didn't you say something?" I shrugged. "I didn't want to be looked at any different. Whether I have to take hormones for forever or not, I'm still Peter. I'm still Spiderman. Nothing is going to change that."

Tony nodded. "Do you wear a binder?" I shook my head. I unzipped my suit and let it pool around my waist. Tony assessed my scars and sighed. "Well I'm sorry for flipping out on you. You're probably going to have to sleep in the lounge until we can fix your room." I shrugged, "It's fine." I turned around and went to head to my room to change. "Hey, Karen sent me your vitals following the comms disconnect. Your vitals spiked." I didn't turn back around. "Oh yeah, just panicked. I'm fine." I lied, no one needed to know I passed out. Tony mumbled something and I pushed past Cap. "Those scars I saw yesterday...?" I didn't stop walking. "They fixed what was wrongfully placed." I went back up to my room and changed in a pair of sweats, leaving my web shooters on.

My mind drifted to Wade. Why did he save me? I've seen him in action. He kills people. So why didn't he just leave me? I shook my head and went to the training room. I pushed open the doors and saw the indent on the mat where I landed. I winced slightly and stared up at the rafters. I backed up to the doors, started to run and shot a web at the farthest web. I jumped and swung into the wall, placing my bare feet on the mat. I put my left hand on the wall to balance myself. I looked for another platform. I saw a cement landing about 4 yards from my original position. I shot another web and jumped, swinging my body up and onto the platform. "Parker!" I leaned over the platform, glancing down at the mats. "What?" I recognized Clint's body language and he looked up, laughing a bit. "What are you doing up there?" "Clearing my head." Clint sat under the platform. "We're all here for you kid. I realize you may not want to talk to us. I have an idea." I lowered myself down from the platform, hanging upside down in my signature spider pose. "And that is?" Clint looked up, his face just a few feet from mine. "Therapy. Specifically therapy groups. I've been to them. Helped when I had a drinking problem. Listen Pete, you're never going to experience life at its fullest if you don't do something about your grief. Channel it. Manage it. Do something. Moping all day and all night is not going to fix it. So pull your head out of your ass and man the fuck up. You hear me?" I blinked slowly, his words bouncing around in my brain. "Yeah...fuck you Barton."

I woke up in the training room. I woke up on that platform I had been on before Clint came in. I actually...I have an appointment for what he talked about. He's not wrong.

All my clothes are currently shut in my half charred room, so I improvised by taking one of Tony's shirts while he was sleeping. I also snapped a picture of him wrapped in Cap's arms. They never really act couply, but I love when I can see them like this. I exited their room, smoothing the shirt. "Jarvis, when Tony wakes up, tell him I've gone out to run an errand." "I will let him know. Anything else Mr. Parker?" "Call me Peter please." I chuckled a bit and slipped into my room to grab my favorite shoes and a pair of headphones. I left the compound, leaving a note for the Avengers when they woke up.

Hey guys,
I went out to run an errand. I will be back sometime soon. Don't worry, I have my suit and phone on me.

Love Spiderboy