Sniper

Chapter 12

The light of my laptop illuminated my face in the darkness of my room, all that could be heard was the clacking of keys and Tords light snores and he snoozed next to me. It'd been almost a year since I'd been on this site, granted I expected myself to have been gone by now but to my surprise I was still kicking, but how how much longer?
I scrolled through the site frantically scanning the paragraphs of text to find some form of out from the contract. I had 4 months left at most. 4 months to try and get myself out of the mess I created. I had never regretted something this much in my life yet I still hadn't even faced the consequences of my actions and every day, every hour that passed, I grew more and more paranoid that today would be the day I finally bit the bullet.
Nothing on the site had anything to do with backing out of your contract, not that I was that surprised, no contact details, no cancellation option, nothing! Even if I had to pay to back out I would have done it! So there was nothing I could do to guarantee the safety of my life. I mentally beat myself for making such a stupid mistake. Sure back then it's not like I had any knowledge of where my life would go in the upcoming year, nor who would come into it, but I was sure as shit wrong about what I guessed it'd be like.
I close all the tabs and slam my laptop shut out of frustration, the sound was a bit louder than I anticipated and it woke Tord from his sleep with a slight startle.

"Huh? What's going on?!" Tord slurred out trying to sound awake but failing miserably.

"Sorry," I whisper, "I just got annoyed at something I didn't mean to wake you, just go back to sleep."

Tord replies with a simple "mmh" and a gentle smile. I lay down as well and he wrapped his arms around me supporting my whole body against his.
It'd been just about a month since I officially moved in, life had been relatively peaceful; well compared to how life used to be. Our relationship had become very domesticated. We'd wake up around the same time, cuddle for a while, Tord would get up and head to work for the day and I would potter around the house keeping myself busy. At night he'd come home, we'd have dinner and watch whatever we were watching and then every other night we'd get a bit more... uh... intimate. It's was pleasant... but I'd be lying if I said it wasn't getting a bit monotonous. Since being let go from my job I didn't really have much to do during the day. It wasn't until I started spending so much time alone that I realised I didn't really have many constructive hobbies, so my days were becoming quite boring without Tord around to keep me entertained. I wanted to mention it to Tord but I felt like I shouldn't complain especially after everything he'd done for me, taking me in, feeding me, listening to me, he even drove me to my therapy sessions; I didn't even know he had a car until after the accident. I wanted to do something with my time but I didn't want to come across as ungrateful to Tord.

Thoughts raced through my mind all night and I was completely unable to get any sleep because of it, thoughts of my inevitable death compared with my desire to do something with my life, they in regular circumstances wouldn't be comparable but I guess this wasn't regular circumstances.

Tord yawns exasperatedly; guess that meant he was awake, "morning." He grumbles.

"Morning," I respond, my voice a bit raspy.

"Hm? Everything alright?" Tords head lifts off his pillow to get a better look at me.

"Hmm? Oh uh, yeah, just a bit, spacey I guess." I stare at the ceiling, my mind still racing

"You didn't sleep again did you? That's 3 nights in a row, really if something's wrong you can tell me, I'll help as much as I can." He placed a kiss on my forehead and I'm pulled out of my trace slightly

I don't say anything, I simply point to my lips childishly wanting another kiss from him.

He complies with a quiet chuckle kissing my lips softly, pulling away for a moment before kissing me over and over again all over my face causing me to laugh stupidly.