Holding on Would've Been Selfish

Chapter 1- The start of a new beginning

A time of vulnerability and healing was the ideal time for us to run into each other. It was extremely quick and unplanned how everything happened, well, at least from my end. I had gone to New Jersey for a bride and groomsmen meet and greet for my cousin's upcoming wedding. Leanna and Al set up a fun painting activity for the bridesmaids and groomsmen. There were large sub sandwiches, drinks, music, jokes and lots of pictures. It was a very great way to start off a vibe with complete strangers. When everything was over Leanna and I headed back to her mother's car dealership. My aunt Eva was anxiously waiting for me to fill her in on who my partner was and how everything went overall. When coming from a hispanic family, gossip is a huge thing. Just as I told her my experience, she cut me off.

"Your admirer came by the house and the dealership looking for you." she said joyfully.

"what the fuck?" was my first reaction.

I was clearly confused because I did not know anyone else from Jersey that was not family. Then for my luck, my mother Mary decided to put her two cents in.

"Yeah Melissa, your boyfriend was driving around hoping to see you." she said sarcastically.

That's when I told Eva and Mary to stop calling that creepy guy that I didn't know, my boyfriend.

"Fine, he wasn't bad looking though." mother Mary added.

All of a sudden I got curious. Who the hell was this creepy thirsty fuck that seemed to know somewhat about me. My aunt Eva told me that he was her friend and that his name was James. James had a business with his dad and would also drive cars to Virginia, Maryland and North Carolina as a side job. Just as she told me that my mother Mary was going to buy something for the car and I walked out with her. That is when James and I first crossed paths but I was not aware that it was him. My mother smacked my arm and told me;

"you dumbass, that was him, go back inside and meet him."

When I walked back in, my aunt Eva started laughing her ass off. You see, she has this thing that when a situation gets awkward for other people, it all of a sudden becomes funny to her. James immediately started blushing and smiling, while wearing his work clothes. My first impression of him was wow, he isn't really my type of guy but seeing him dirty and all was attractive because it indicated that he was a hard worker. We didn't talk to each other. Hi and Bye was it. The following day, my aunt Eva had a barbecue. She told me that she invited him, however, he didn't show up. My family ended up leaving around 7pm. James came around 9pm. Shockingly, I was still there. He came in a teal colored shirt, very clean. Whereas, I was dressed as if I was going on a jog with some black leggings and a black t shirt. He said hello to everyone there. To be specific, my mother, my aunt's brother in law, my aunt and me. My aunt Eva offered James some left over food from the barbecue and there they were, in the kitchen gossiping about his ex girlfriend Marisol. Apparently, James saw Marisol and her new boyfriend and he didn't feel anything for her anymore. At least, that's what I overheard him telling my aunt. I just didn't believe it though. If he didn't care, why mention it? I mean, I saw his face while he was telling her that. It sure did seem as if he still cared. I lost interest I never knew I even had and went back to the living room. Five minutes later, aunt Eva was telling me to go make him feel as if he had company. I felt bad because her table is usually for six people and he was there alone. However, while walking over, I made it very clear that I was not a side piece or some whore that can be used to overcome someone else. He started laughing. I sat down and we didn't talk. He was talking to my aunt and all of a sudden my mother and my aunt's brother-in law joined. That's when everything started. My aunt's brother-in law Jason switched seats with James so that James could be right next to me. Once that happened, they all pressured James to shoot his shot with me. It was awkward and unpleasant as hell. He was legit flirting with me in front of my family. I was blushing but till this day I'm not sure if it was because of what he was saying or the awkwardness of the situation. My mother Mary knew that I hated being on the spot so she figured, why not make this worse for Melissa?