Feb. 3, 2020
Omfg I'm so mad at my dad!! Hes so controlling and rude and ughhhh I just hate him so much!!!
He wont stop insulting kpop and keeps telling ME to calm down!!
Dude I'm not even fucking doing anything at all!!!
Gosh and I can't even say anything cuz he'll get mad and I'll get my phone taken and get yelled at😔😔
Gosh istg I liked it better when he left us
Damn this chapter lets so many of yall see what my life is like almost every day. Everyday I wake up and I'm just automatically mad and annoyed and I just feel like I wanna cry ughhhhhh
If he just left, it'd all be okay. When he left, I didnt have anxiety, I wasn't sad or depressed, I was perfectly okay. Everything was amazing.
But then he came back, gosh I remember that feeling when he came back in the house😔😔😔
Omfg and yall remember how I was so excited that we got a fishie tank and bought fishies? Well now we have 5, yes, 5 lmao
And bruh istg he spends more money on fishies than he does his own kids. And he pays more attention to them too, honestly that's a good thing tho.
I could come out to him and he wouldnt even know that I had. I could probably start hurting myself and he wouldnt notice until weeks later.
Do talk ever feel like you just wanna die, but like you dont even have a quick way to end it?
Honestly not many people would even miss me.
Dang that reminds me, if I ever do end it, I should probably have a letter on why lol. My parents are so... idk that word, so oblivious to things around them, I dont even think they'd know why. I mean my parents think I get bullied, so that's probably the first thing they'd think ab lmao
But gosh my mom has no idea all the reasons why I did it.
Dang what if I didnt leave a letter, and just let them wonder.
That reminds me
Let's say heaven and hell is real, okay? And let's say I believe in everything in the bible is true, like I'm supposed to.
If I killed myself, would I go to heaven? I mean ofc I'd get my life right with God and ask for forgiveness, but like even still, would killing myself contradict all of that?
I dknt even know, and honestly I dont care either.
Also dont pm me ab this lol this is pretty normal for me
