I hold her all night, I hold her so close to my chest and continue stroking her hair soothingly until the sun is peaking through the curtains. Neither one of us speak, she only slept for maybe an hour. I on the other hand didn't get a wink, I was scared that if I fell asleep I'd wake up and she'd be gone.
She shifts for the first time and pulls away from me, I don't let go though I let my hands go with her even though it's kinda awkward. But like I said I was scared, if I let her go I fear that all this will go away and I don't want it to.
"You should get some sleep, you actually look like shit"
She smiles just a bit and my heart melts again, I quickly pull her into me again feel my tears pricking at the corner of my eyes. "I'm so sorry baby" I mumble into her side. I feel a few of my tears slip onto her shirt, I'm surprised when her hand is on my back and gently starts to rub.
"Me to"
She whispers, I look up feeling confused. She doesn't look at me though she keeps her eyes on her lap as her hand continues to gently stroke my back. I pull myself together and sit up next to her, she look exhausted and torn but still so beautiful.
"You know I didn't do anything right? That woman was sent by my mother"
She takes a deep breath and nods "I know" she mumbles and now I'm completely confused "How do you know?"
Another deep breath and then she's looking up at me "Taehyung told me last night" all I can manage is an oh as my mind starts to overthink again. "So you believe me that nothing happened right?"
She nods but I can tell she's holding something in, I pull her closer and kiss her shoulder gently "Talk to me" I whisper, I see her eyes get glossy but she's fighting against her tears.
"I guess I'm just a little upset still...seeing you with another woman like that...I don't know...and it didn't really look like you were fighting her off..."
Her gaze drops back down to her lap and she takes another breath, I feel like shit and I didn't know what to say. I guess I could of been more aggressive with the woman but I didn't...why didn't I push her away instantly?
"I'm sorry y/n"
She nods and gets up, I feel a sense of panic wash over me but I feel stuck. I don't know what to say or do and I know if I don't do anything I'll surly fuck up any chance I have with her. "I'm going to shower, you should go"
I'm shattered.
I can't fuck this up. I've worked so hard to get her to even consider being with me. So I get up and follow her.
"Y/n"
She jumps and tries to cover herself with the towel "what? Didn't I tell you to go?" Another sting to my heart but I ignore it.
"Yes but I don't want to, I love you y/n. I don't think you understand how incredibly hard it is for me to say that out loud to another human being but with you I want to say it all the time, I want to shout it out so everyone knows I love you"
Her eyes are watery again as the steam from the shower starts to fill up the large bathroom.
"I'm sorry, I should of pushed that woman away. I wish I would have done that, cause the hurtful and untrustworthy look you keep giving me is killing me. You have to believe me when I say that I would never do anything to fuck this up...I want you and only you..."
She looks down at her bare feet and let's a few of her tears fall. I take a few steps forward and grab onto her chin, making her look up at me. I feel my chest tighten when I see the tears fall down her cheeks, it kills me.
"I hate you"
She whispers, I feel my own tears start to form but I do my best to keep them in. "I know baby, I do to" her lower lip pouts as she tires to suppress her emotions.
"I promise I'll never make you feel this way again, I hate seeing my minx so hurt"
She hits my chest before falling into me and wrapping her arms around me. I quickly embrace her and shower her in kisses, I feel relieved that she's in my arms again. But I still feel incredibly angry that this whole situation happened because of my stupid mother.
"I love you, I love you so much y/n you really have no idea"
I mumble into her hair, she nuzzles her face into my chest some more and I smile. "I love you to jerk" I smile wider at that before slapping her bare ass
"Let's shower you smell like a brewery" She frowns and pushes me a bit "it's your fault that I do" I chuckle before I pull off my shirt. "I know"
We both get in the shower and I instantly feel relaxed, the warm water hits my back as the other shower head hits y/n's back. I smile down at her, she smiles shyly before turning away from me and letting the warm water run over her face.
Something about showering together is so intimate, I've never done this before either but it feels nice. I grab the soap and lather up her sponge before gently starting to wash her back, I place a few kisses along her shoulders before I make them soapy. I can see her cheeks rise as she smiles at the gesture.
When she turns towards me and smiles I feel a sense of comfort, she takes the sponge from me and starts to lather my chest up. "What's wrong?"
She mumbles looking up at me, I shake my head and pull her back into me. I'm slightly turned on by her naked soapy body gliding against mine but now doesn't seem like the time I fuck...well maybe.
"I'm so happy, I really thought I lost you"
"Me to"
~~~
GUYS!
GUESS WHAT!
I got floor seats and
Soundcheck!! Ahh
I can't even believe it
I've been crying all day
💜💜💜
YOU ARE READING
Best of me | KSJ
FanficHe's the oldest of three and his family wants him to settle down and start his own family. He wants nothing of the sorts. But fate keeps pushing him in a different direction.
