Cold Comfort »Z.M.« ✔️

49."That's why I wanted to suggest you.."

   After he leaves again Rodger comes back. I stand outside the room and when I hear the doors close I go back in the room.

"Why are you wearing a hoodie? It's hot in here." Rodger says confused. I take it off and point at the hickey he gave me.

"Couldn't risk Zayn seeing that, could we?" I ask back. His eyes widen.

"I'm sorry.." he looks down, "I fucked up again." he whispers. I hug him.

"You didn't. But now it's my turn." I smirk. He looks in my eyes. I pull him to bed and push him down on it. He chuckles. I lift up his shirt. He takes it off. I trace my fingers across his torso. I stop my fingers on his lower stomach's right side. Left side for him. Point at it. Rodger look there.

"Zayn has my name tattooed there." I say. He frowns.

"Wait, are you serious? He has a tattoo of your name? And I didn't know that?" he asks. I shrug. Then I lean in, begin to leave kisses up from his chest to his collar bone. I make a hickey and get up. He lies there, already exhausted. I press my lips on his and let myself carry away. He answers with the same. But then something clicks in my mind and I pull away. What the hell am I doing? Why am I cheating on Zayn?

"I'm sorry, Rodgy." I whisper and lie on him. He slowly rubs my back.

"I understand if you've a bad feeling for cheating. I have a bad feeling too, for loving my brother's girlfriend." he mumbles. I look up at him. He looks peaceful and stressed at the same time.

"I feel bad, because I don't want to hurt any of you two. I can't choose only one of you, but I can't choose both of you either." I answer. He chuckles.

"You can choose only one of us." he answers. Suddenly cramps overtake my body. I quietly curse.

"No, I... Can't." I mumble. He kisses my forehead. I hug him as tight as I could so that I wouldn't feel the pain, but it is getting unbearable.

"Hey, you're going to crush me." he breathes out. I let him go and roll on my back. I begin to pull on my hair instead.

"I hate being a woman." I cry out.

"What's up? Why are you crying?" he asks as he hovers over me. I look in his eyes and let out a shaky sigh.

"Period cramps." I answer innocently. He frowns and slowly leans in. Kisses me. I kiss him back, but after a moment I push him away, cause the pain only grows bigger. He gets out of the bed.

"I'll get you some painkillers, little." he tells mr and leaves. I just lie there thinking. Zayn does not deserve to be treated like this. I have to tell him the truth.

   After a moment Rodger is back with a glass of water and some painkillers. I sit up and take them.

"Rodg, I have to tell Zayn everything." I quietly say after a minute of silence. He sits next to me.

"Thanks. He would've told you to not tell me." he answers. I look at him. Oh... Shit...

"Zayn?" I quietly ask. He nods. "I'm sorry, Zaynie." I whisper as I look down.

"It's okay, my little angel. I love you. And I've accepted that he loves you too and you probably at least like him as well." he says. I look up at him once again.

"What do you mean?" I ask. He smiles a bit. He's about to say something, but Rodger comes in the room as well.

"I, Uhm... I told Liam about the deal." he says. Zayn nods and motions for him to sit next to us. He seems really scared.

"You didn't tell me you two were actually going behind my back." Zayn sighs. Rodger looks at me.

"Sorry, I... I went too far and it's not her fault..." he looks at Zayn, but then sits down on the bed.

"You went too far? You both went too far." he answers. Rodger nods. "Kay, I want you to know something important." he continues. I look at him with a concerned look.

"I have a feeling that this is about you marrying me just because you got threatened." I mumble. He frowns.

"Okay, you know that already, great. Rodger told you." he groans. I shake my head what surprises him.

"I heard it on my own. I woke up when Rodger tried to wiggle out of my embrace. I heard you saying you'd explain why you got high so I thought if I knew the reason I could try to make you feel better. I guess that was a mistake." I explain. He takes my hand.

"I love you, Kay, you have to understand it." he breathes out. I'm confused now. What do I have to understand?

"You may love me, but are you in love with me?" I ask. I guess I confused him just as much as he did with me.

"What difference does it make?" he quietly asks. I weakly smile at him.

"It changes everything." I answer as my smile fades. He sighs

"You know that I'm in love with you, I think, I believe that I'm in love with you. It's just that I'm not ready to get married yet." he says taking my hand in his. That breaks my heart. And I cheated on him...

"Like I said to Rodgy earlier, I just can't choose only one of you." I whisper. He nods.

"That's why I wanted to suggest you... Uhm... To be together with both of us..." he suggests and looks down. What the- Is he actually suggesting that? I look at Rodger. He is just as shocked. I look back at Zayn.

"Are you serious?" I almost choke on air. He nods. Looks at Rodger.

"If Rodg is down for that." he answers. I look at him again. He hesitates for a while.

"I'm down if Kayla's down." he answers with a shaky voice. WHAT? I...

"Uhm..." I look at Zayn, "I really don't know, we can try, but I-"

"You'll get used to it." he smiles and takes my hand, "So you agree then?" he asks to make sure. I nod. Right now my heart is pounding and I have no idea if this is real or not. I'm together with both of them now... How the hell did I get this done?