Worthy

The Explanation

----Dameon POV----

    She was gone. I let her walk away. I mean, I had to right? I couldn't just let her throw away everything for me. I knew I wasn't worth that, no matter how much I loved her. I just had to man up and relearn how to live my life without her. I snatched the ring of the mailbox, wiped my tears off my face, avoiding where she had kissed and head inside.

    The last thing I wanted to hear was my cousin's mouth, but I wouldn't be so lucky. “So It's done?” he asked.

“Is what done?”

“You broke it off and got our spot back.” My face made him raise his hands and back outta my space. “My old man told me what was going on.”

“Maybe I need to remind ya pops of his place cause being in my business is NOT it!”

“Man chill out, he was just looking out for you.”

“By telling you my business huh”

“Look cuzzo he was just making sure somebody has your back jeez chill.” We both plop down on the sofa's. “How come you ain't tell me you was still smashing her? I mean I know you two smashed after she popped dude in the alley but I didn't know you fell for her. And this school bullshit... what was that all about? That right there should have told you it wasn't gonna work.”

“Really Dr. Phil, why is that?”

“Cause she was trying to change you, make you all educational so you could fit into her world.”

Educational? He is not the yellow crayon in the box.

    This right here is why we didn't tell anyone. All they would have done was put a negative spin on how we changed each other, try to set us against each other. I think we both knew deep down this was gonna happen.

“She wasn't trying to change me I went back to school because I needed something more for my life than just hustling and just maybe I wanted to fit into her world a little, but I knew I damn sure didn't want her in ours.”

“Damn you asked for your ring back though cuzzo that's cold even for you.”

“I wouldn't do that, at least not to her. She took it off. I wanted to tell her to keep it, but the words just wouldn't come out.

    Mike just looked at me with this extra doofy look on his face. “You are serious huh cuzzo; I mean I know what I just said and all but you did like forreal forreal love her. So why did you break-up with her? Why don't you find another way to get the spot back instead of giving in?”

“I didn't do this for some damn building I did it for her!”

“For her?” He questioned. “Doed she know that part cause shorty didn't seem to thrilled about it.”

“What was I supposed to do Pop's threatened to take her entire livelihood if I didn't walk away; school, money, family, all of it.”

“But you got more money than you could ever spend in this lifetime. Cuz besides Unc you the only hustler I know that invest in big shit and save their money; plus ain't she like a baby genius or something? She prob wouldn't have to pay for school and whenever she needed I know you had her.”

“It's s not all about the money.”

“Man it's always about the money!” Mike clapped back.

“Since yo smart ass got all the answers, what about her family? How is money gonna fix that? Her Mama is her entire world, Wes is her best friend, and at the end of the day she adores her Pops. Yea, she loves me but I can't and won't compete with it that.”

“Damn Pop's a cold piece of work.” Mike said while shaking his head. But Pops wasn't that cold, he's just a father who wanted the best for his daughter. I couldn't say that if the roles were reverse that I be ok with my daughter being with someone like me either. After sitting in silence for a moment knocks come from my front door. “You expect of someone?”

“Nah”

   Neither of us moved until Wes yelled out from the other side. “You want me to open it?” Asked Mike.

“Yeah let him in.”

    Wes had said nothing while I stood in their kitchen and agreed to Pop's terms. He just stood there confused, I couldn't say I blamed him. I mean, what  would you say when you find out the two most important people in your life had been doing shit behind your back while smiling your face? I guess he finally got his words together and was ready to let me have it. Maybe he just wants to beat the shit outta me. Either way, I knew I had it coming and wasn't going to put up a fight. 

    Mike left since the air in the room was tense and awkward. He knew Wes and I had a lot of things to work out in private. Wes walked in and just stood there looking like he was trying to decide whether to cuss me out or knock me out until he glanced down and notice her ring on the table. It looked as if though his legs had been taken out from under him the way he plopped down in the chair behind him. He just stared at it for a while until he finally spoke, “So you really did it, huh?”

“Yeah that was the deal.”

“Did sh- did she cry a lot?” Wes questioned.

“No I told her not waste your tears, just forget about me.”

    Wes just sat there shaking his head in disbelief. “Why bruh? Why her?”

“I didn't plan it, kinda just happened."

“How does four years strong and an engagement just happen?” I could tell his confusion was making him upset. I thought the best way for him to understand was for me to take him back to the beginning.

     I told him about the party, and the attack. I told him she did what she had to survive in that moment. I told him that even though she had made the first move I did nothing to stop it because I wanted her from the minute I met her; that I never acted on it before because I didn't want to mess up our friendship. The major reasons for us not share this with anyone wasn't because we were ashamed or being sneaky it was cause I worried that my lifestyle at the time would put her in danger. I even went as far to explain that she didn't know, that she made me choose to be a better person for her. How she unknowingly influenced my decision to go to school and to drastically changed my role in my “family's business”.

    Throughout the conversation Wes didn't interrupt me or ask me any questions he just sat there motionless except for when he wiped the tears from his face. I ended my explanation would an apology.

“I'm sorry, I am. You're the closest thing I've ever had to a best friend. I even love you like you my own brother. Hopefully one day you will forgive me, but know I don't regret nothing I did cause no matter what I love her more than anything.”

    He just sat there quietly for a while, figured he was trying to process everything I had just said. Out of nowhere, he stood up and walked to the door. I assumed he was just going to leave, but he turned back to me, “Let's go!”

“Let's go where?”

“To get your girl back!”

____S/N_____

Do you agree with Dameons choice?

Was Wes a shock?

Remember Comment/Share/Vote ❣