Ricky and EJ Oneshots

He Kept My Heart

Ricky was always exhausted all the time. It was a feeling he had for a while now. No matter what he did or who he hung out with, he would always feel tired and blue. He started feeling different after the breakup with his ex-boyfriend, EJ. At first, it wasn't that bad. He could actually get out of bed and he was still into his hobbies like playing the guitar. Then, after a few weeks everything went down hill. His mom divorced his dad and left them. He knew it was his fault because she hated homosexuals and anything different.

He didn't feel motivated to leave the house besides going to school. He stopped going to rehearsals and Nini was getting ferrous at him so he dropped out of the musical completely. So, just like EJ wanted, the role of being Troy went to him instead.

Before he would go sleep at night, he would try to remember what happened the night EJ ended things. All that came to mind was the feelings of sadness that he never felt before. There was this pain in his chest that seemed like it was endless.

EJ broke up with him because he wasn't ready to come out yet. He also said he didn't want to be friends with him anymore because Ricky was too flamboyant. Whatever that meant.

It seemed like everything was his fault. Just existing seemed to be his fault.

He walked inside his home that didn't feel like a home and went downstairs to his room. His dad was never home anymore because he drowned himself into work so Ricky didn't have a reason to be anywhere but his room. He sat his backpack down and he stared at his skateboard in the corner next to his stand. He stopped skating because the happy feeling he would get when he did was gone.

He stripped himself of his school clothes and put on his comfortable ones that where a plaid print his mother had gotten him for Christmas. He tossed his dirty clothes into his laundry bin and grabbed his phone out of his backpack, placing it on the charger next to his nightstand by his bed.

He plopped his heavy body onto the bed and wrapped himself into his blanket. Trying to relax and forget everything.

He would never actually get to sleep or take a nap because his brain seemed to never shut down. His brain either told him evil thoughts like he was nothing or if he was lucky, he would space out and everything went blank. He thought of nothing but stared at his nightstand that held a family picture of his pre-divorced parents and child him.

Today he wasn't lucky and the evil thoughts clouded his brain.

The next day, he left for school and walked towards the bus stop. He started to ride the bus when he stopped skating. He sat on a bench and played a game on his phone. Ricky was spaces out into his game that he got easily startled when someone tapped his shoulder. He looked up and saw EJ looking down at him. He didn't pay mind to him and went back to gaming.

"I guess I deserved that" EJ took a seat next to him and tried to start a conversation.

"How are you doing?" Ricky looked at him and his stare was filled with mixed emotions that confused EJ. He shortly answered back with a thumbs up.

The bus pulled up and Ricky stood up and slung his backpack on his shoulder. EJ stopped him before he could actually get on; his leg on on the first step of the entry way.

"I need to talk to you" EJ had a firm grip on Ricky. He kept looking into his eyes; trying to find any sign that he was listening to him.

"Hey kid, I gotta go. Either get on or don't" the bus driver said. Ricky sighed and backed away from the bus. The doors closed and he watched the bus drive up the lane and take a right. He looked at EJ who seemed relieved that he stayed.

"What is it?" Ricky was tired and wanted to get the day over with.

"I need to talk to you but somewhere else. Please come with. I'll drop you off at school after" Ricky studied EJ. He didn't seem like he was kidding or pranking him.

"Fine" Ricky followed him to his car and he drove them to their secret spot by a lake. Ricky hasn't gone their since they broke up. He hasn't gone anywhere because his body always feels like he's carrying a bag of bricks. So, he just lays in bed and watch tv shows that don't make sense to him. His dad doesn't even notice how Ricky went to a hello-dad to leave-me-alone in a matter of months. Ricky knew he was busy so he never asked for help or anything to bug that might throw his dad off. For now, he just deals with it himself.

"I'm sorry on how I ended things" EJ's spoke suddenly. Every memory he ever made with EJ came flooding out causing his brain to have a meltdown. Ricky got out of the car in a rush. He felt a panic attack coming so he tried to think of his happy place.

It didn't help because his happy thoughts were clouded over by his not so happy thoughts.

His hand shot up to his chest. He felt his heartbeat speed up and his lungs collapsing on themselves. His chest was in enormous amount of pain and his breathing quickened by the second. He tried to walk away from the vehicle but his body succumbed to the bag of bricks. He fell to the ground gasping for air. Ricky heard EJ's voice but was to focused on slowing his breathing he didn't comprehend what he said.

Ricky was about to give up and pass out but EJ shoved something into his hand.

His inhaler.

He placed the inhaler towards his mouth and took several deep breaths. His lungs filled up with air and his chest felt normal and not like it had a spear through it. He tried to suppress his memories of his mother and EJ but no matter how hard he tried they would always resurface and cause him triple the pain.

"You okay?" EJ asked as he helped Ricky from the ground.

"Yeah" Ricky's voice was raspy. He looked at the lake and calmed himself down. EJ stood next to him wondering what he did wrong.

"You kept my inhaler"

"Yeah I did" EJ answered back.

Ricky stared at the boy he once dated. He thought EJ would forget about him and toss everything of his out. Guess he was wrong.

It made him feel a certain way that some little object was still kept by his ex. He felt like he was falling for EJ all over again.

"Iwanttogetbacktogether" EJ rushed the words out of his mouth. Ricky looked over at EJ who seemed really nervous. Ricky didn't know how much he wished to hear those words. He reached out to EJ's hand; slowing hesitating. He wrapped his hands around EJ's calloused ones. He missed their touch. He missed the warm feeling that ran through his body. He missed everything about EJ even his pet peeves like when EJ never closed the door fully or when he would never tie his shoelaces.

"I'm ready to come out and be with you" EJ explained as he faced towards Ricky. He took both of Ricky's hands into his and looked him in the eyes. Ricky cracked a grin and gave EJ a kiss on the cheek.

"You better take me to school because I will smack you if I'm late for class," he smiled at EJ. "I'm serious! You know how Mrs. Jenkins is"

"Mrs. Jenkins wouldn't be like that if you didn't put that tac on her seat" Ricky rolled his eyes and got in the passenger seat.

It was strange that he didn't feel tired after being with EJ. He liked it and he also liked EJ; maybe even loved. He doesn't know yet.