Perfect Love (Sterek Book 1)

Forgiveness Means Everything Part 1

Stiles POV

It's been a week since my fight with Derek, my dad is getting better at least he is at home again. I haven't spoken to any of the pack members, I don't even sit with them at lunch anymore. I'm planning on quitting the lacrosse team so I can spend more time with my dad.

I'm sitting at an empty table in the cafeteria, reading a book, when suddenly the whole pack, except for Derek, sits down with me. I look up at them annoyed and then I look back down to my book ignoring them. "Come on Stiles you can't stay mad at us forever, please we miss spending time with you" Liam says but I just keep reading my book ignoring him.

"Stiles I know we hurt you, for that we are so sorry, please just talk to us I'm begging you, this silence from you is terrible," Scott says pleadingly but I still refuse to look at them, just staring at my book as the tears start to fall.

"Stiles, we get that you're mad at us, but we just wanted you to know that we're sorry. We hope you can forgive us someday, but until then we'll leave you alone," Isaac says as the pack gets up and moves to another table.

As soon as the pack isn't looking I get up and leave as fast as I can. I run out the main doors and to roscoe, once I get to my jeep I jump in but I don't start the engine. I just sit there and stare at the steering wheel as tears flow down my cheeks, I don't know why I'm crying. I'm so mad at them right now but at the same time I miss spending time with my friends.

I look up when I hear a soft knock on the window, when I see who it is I look down again so that he doesn't see that I'm crying. "Stiles, can I please talk to you, it's important, there's something that I need to give you, so can I get in please" he says and I just nod.

He quickly gets in on the passenger's side, I still don't look at him, I just stare at the steering wheel for I few seconds. There is silence between us, before I can't handle it anymore, I break the silence. "What do you want Scott?" I ask him without looking up, but I can hear my voice cracking and I know that he heard it too.

"Stiles, why are you crying?" he asks, taking a hold of my chin, forcing me too look him in the eyes. When I do all I see is heartache and loneliness, more tears fall down my cheek, I start sobbing uncontrollably, just shaking my head the entire time. I feel Scott pulling me closer to him, I feel his arms around my shoulders holding me in a hug on instinct I wrap my arms around him and cry.

After a while I feel Scott's shoulders shaking, so I look up only to see him crying to, I pull away from him only to have him look at me in confusion. I pay no mind to it as I just clear my throat "Why are you here Scott and why are you crying?" I ask, as I watch the school building in front of us. "Well I came to give you this" he says, handing me a letter. I take it from him putt it on my lap and look back at him only to see him wipe a tear away.

"Why are you crying?" I ask him again a little impatiently. "Stiles, I know we messed up, I messed up, but please don't be mad at us forever. I miss my best friend please forgive me" he says between sobs. I look away shaking my head in disbelief.

"Scott you broke my heart by trusting someone else, when you should have trusted me. Because of that my dad almost died, you believed that I could kill someone in cold blood when you are supposed to know me better than anyone else. Yet, you believed him and not your best friend, so how am I supposed to trust you again. Because you trusted Theo everyone turned against me, even Derek. I lost everyone because of you, but I'm not mad I'm just disappointed. Scott, I forgave you a long time ago, I just didn't know how to tell you," I say looking back at him only to see him crying again.

"What are you saying Stiles?" he asks, trying to wipe his tears away. I just smile and pull him into a hug. "I'm saying I miss my best friend too Scotty," I say to him only to hear him crying even harder. I look up when I hear a small gasp from the front of my jeep, only to see the whole pack standing there wiping their tears away.

"Where is Derek I need to talk to him?" I ask looking at Scott but he only looks down at his lap. He speaks up before I can "read the letter it's from Derek he left Beacon Hills four days ago, he's not coming back, Stiles his gone," Scott says getting out of the jeep and walking away, giving me time to read the letter, so I open it slowly.

Dear Stiles

When you're reading this it means I've already left Beacon Hills. I'm not coming back, you asked me to leave you alone, so I did but I couldn't just leave without saying goodbye. I asked Scott to give this to you once I'm gone.

I love you Stiles that will never change, but I have to leave. I can't be so close to you and not be with you, it's killing me so please understand why I left. I know you're mad now but I'm hoping that someday you will be able to find it in your heart to forgive me. Until you do, I need to leave and go on with my life, just know that I will always love you.

Take care of yourself and again I'm really sorry that I hurt you. I never wanted to, if you need me just ask Scott and he'll tell you where I am but for now I have to go. Goodbye Stiles Stilinski.

Always yours

Sour wolf

I reread the letter twice wiping my tears away. I start the engine and drive away from the School building heading to Derek's loft. When I get there I run upstairs only to find it empty, I fall to my knees crying, knowing that he left because of me and I didn't even get to say goodbye.

I turn around slowly when I hear the loft door open behind me, only to find Scott there along with the rest of the pack. I get up as fast as I can and wipe my tears away before they can see, but just in case I look away from all of them as I make my way out the door. Only to be stopped by Isaac, when he grabs my arm, so I stop dead in my tracks.

"What Isaac?" I ask without turning to him but Scott answers instead of Isaac. "We came looking for you Stiles, we need to talk to you please give us a chance" he says and I just nod without turning around. "Then talk I'm listening" I say to them still standing with my back to them. "Please look at us Stiles" Lydia says placing her hand on my shoulder, so I slowly turn to them only to hear them all gasp. "Stiles, we know why you're here and Scott can tell you where to find him but first hear us out please" Isaac says taking me by the shoulders and leading me over to the couch that is still there.

"Guys you don't have to say anything, I'm not mad anymore, I forgave you all a long time ago. I just didn't know how to say it, that's why I've been avoiding you, but now you know so please just let me go," I say looking at my hands. After a few minutes of silence I look up to see them all staring at me with wide eyes and mouths agape. "What are you all staring at?" I ask, but no one answers me so I start to get up slowly only to be stopped by Liam.

"Stiles, are you, okay I mean the Stiles I know would never give in that easily so why did you," he asks slowly. I look up at them with tears threatening to fall, hearing gasps from everyone, I clear my throat to get their attention then I slowly start to explain.

"There is no reason to be mad, there is no reason for me to feel anything and there is no reason for me to care. I lost everything and everyone I ever cared about it's my fault. There is no fixing that so why try, I'll help you with whatever it is that you need my help but then after that, I'm done. When the school year is over I'm leaving and never coming back, my dad will understand and I hope you do too," I say as I get up and leave the loft leaving them dumbfounded.