Falling slowly ...

The auction

I was tired now. I had been calling Ian forever.

Damien had gone to his family, leaving me alone. This loneliness is too much, now that I am used to his presence. Used to him being around me.

On top of that this morning Ian was supposed to go to Mythical office to present idea of 'Smoshcast'. It was now too urgent to know if they will buy us or not, cause day after tomorrow Defy is selling away Smosh in an auction.

Yes, people will bid on my family.

I myself am unaware as to how am i containing my desperasy.

And the worst part is that since I officially am a part of Defy still, it will depend on them whether I belong with Smosh or with Defy.

Tomorrow my a rich bidder will decide who do I stay with- my family in LA, or with my mum in NY. I will quit LA if I have to leave Smosh.

I was getting more desperate by the hour and needed something to fill my brain.

"Hello?"
"Y/n, dear, how are you?"  said the voice on other end.
"I am fine sir, how are you?" I asked the owner of Defy.

It had been so long since I last heard his voice, on the day we were laid out. I quite frankly missed his voice. He is one person in Defy beside Lily that I will miss.

"So, why have you called?"  he asked after some casual conversation.
"Sir, umm, you know that tomorrow is, the auction."
"Hmm."
"So,umm, I just wanted to know of I am a part of Smosh or Defy."
I said it all out in a flow. I had to know.

"That depends y/n."
"I didn't. I didn't get it sir."
"If the company is big enough to support you, and if they want you, then you are a part of Smosh. But if they don't then I am afraid you still will be with us."

A part of me rose and a part of me sank somewhere.
Even if Ian called me back and tolde they loved the idea, it would still take a day or two at least to go through the paperwork, and if any other company pays more for us, the idea will be gone.

My limbs physically froze just thinking about going back to Defy.
Working under Jacob again.
The memory of his hand on my back, his eyes piercing through me, virtually striping me off and smirking at the thought of it returned.
My vision became hazy and before I could stop it, a tear fell down leaving it's cold trail on my face.
I felt a growing tingle in my nose and it immediately led to another tear.
The next thing I knew I was crying.

Crying silently.

Because the one person I wanted right now, the one person who mattered the most right now was away.
Away where his family was.

I felt Pebbles rub herself against my foot, then paw me.
But she wasn't Damien. I need him.

Suddenly I heard a knock on the door.
Oh my God who is it right now?

"Who is it?" I asked, loud enough.
"Its me y/n. I missed the damn train. Open the door." a recognised voice answered.

Fuck. DAMIEN?

"Umm. Ok. Wait a sec."
He can't see me cry. I don't know why but he can't.

I wiped my tears roughly and then cleaned my nose to the best.
Then I opened the door.

"Where are your bags then?" I asked him as he entered.

"Really? You thought I came here first? I went home kept my bags and then I came he..." he stopped mid sentence. He stopped the very moment he saw me.

Sjit.

That is the funny thing about crying. That is your one emotion you never want to show your near and dear, and that is the one emotion they see the quickest..