Daisies

1.6

"And like the moon, we must go through phases of emptiness to feel full again."

• • •
3 weeks. That's how much time has gone by since our first date, and I've spent almost all of it with him. We go out to eat, to the movies, arcades. He's a sore loser. I've learned a lot about him, like how handsy he gets when he's drunk. I still feel like there's a wall up though, maybe that's why we haven't said what exactly this is. I don't want to push him away by asking, and we've been having fun so why ruin it. But I can't help but wonder if he's also been having this much fun with other girls.

My first day of classes was today, the clock reads 1:09 p.m. , it's finally almost time to leave. I stopped paying attention to people telling us about themselves so long ago, why do we need icebreakers anyways, I'm not paying for this class to break ice with people I probably won't even see next semester.

"Ok thank you all for sharing, we're done for today," It's getting harder to hear her over the sound of people packing up, "Don't forget to do the 'Get to know me' assessment before class on Wednesday!" The tall thin teacher says, sitting down and collecting all of her papers. She reminds me of Lucy Liu but tall, and younger. I grab my bag and walk through the door before everyone tries to squeeze through it at once. I call Jacob, he said he'd pick me up.

I step outside, the sun is hiding behind the clouds but it's still humid. While scanning the parking lot I see him step out of a car and I hang up the phone walking over towards him. He's in a car I've never seen before so it throws me off. "I called you! Did you get a new car?"

"Yep." He leans down to kiss me on the cheek.

"You do realize how many cars you have, right?" I go to get in the passenger seat but he stops me.

"Actually," he starts and I look at him confused, "I got this for you. I know that you were saving up for a car but......" My mind kind of started to lose focus after he said it was for me. Why would he do something like that?

"Jacob! Why..why would you...this car's so expensive. I can't take this, you have to return it." He grabs me by the shoulders and walks me around to the drivers side of the car.

"A thank you would suffice." He says laughing and walks back over to the passenger side, getting in.

"Jacob," I say getting on the driver's side and turning to him earnestly, "This is really nice, and I do thank you but I can't accept this."

"I promise you, it was not a bad investment. Please just take it." I feel conflicted looking into his eyes. The car is so expensive I don't even think I feel comfortable accepting it but at the same time I really do need a car. With the rate of my savings it'll be next school year before I can afford one.

"Ok," I oblige, "But you have to help me think of something to tell my Mom. You don't just come home with an Audi and expect it to fly under the radar." I pull off, trying to get a feel for my new car. My brand new car. This is gonna take some getting used to.

Our ride to Jacob's apartment was filled with me getting excited over all of the features the car has. Also with me trying to give it back again but he wouldn't take it. This only further complicates my thoughts of what we are. I mean even if he is 'dating' other girls, is he buying them cars too? It's not like he's fucking Oprah or something. We reach his apartment complex and when we get out I can't stop staring at the car.

"Are you gonna come in or just stare at it out here all day?" He's wearing grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt that is slightly damp, he was probably working out before he came to get me. Working out gives him energy, too much energy sometimes.

Once we get in I walk straight up to his bedroom and throw my bag to the ground then plop onto his bed. He follows behind me but when he gets inside he starts to undress, making my face heat up.