This is the story of Pedro Sorenson, a crazy son of a bitch who steals llamas. It makes no sense and is really what happens when I try to be creative while tired. This is trash have a good time.
(Anything stupid and offensive said in the parts do no...
The 3 llamas were stolen by Pedro Sorenson, who made a break for the Blimp. The Blimp was about 2 miles away from the Village where Eva's llamas were stolen. Eva got into her motorcycle and drove at Pedro at top speed. It was fast, but like Big Bird, Pedro was faster.
In the distance, they saw the blimp. Eva didn't want to let the thief get away, so she grabbed her shotgun, trying to shoot down the escape blimp. She aimed, but Pedro saw, so he reached into his pants and grabbed a can of heinz baked beans™, and threw them at Eva's gun. Pedro's aim was impeccable, and the shotgun fell from the motorbike and down a dirt slope into the river below.
Pedro would need to jump up to the blimp to escape, but the land was too filled with trees, and too bumpy for the jump. Eva was gaining on him, loading her second shotgun she had for some reason. The river besides them now took a sharp turn in their direction, so they now ran towards it. Pedro needed to some how escape, and then he had the perfect solution. He saw a rope bridge that crossed the river, so he took the opportunity to cross it.
Eva was right behind him, riding up to the bridge. Pedro needed to think, and fast.
He decided to take one of the llamas, and have it bite the rope off the stick, causing the bridge to fall, Eva on it.
"Hehe hoho fuck you!" Screamed Pedro, as h̶e̶ ̶c̶o̶m̶m̶i̶t̶t̶e̶d̶ ̶m̶u̶r̶d̶e̶r̶ ̶a̶n̶d̶ ̶d̶e̶s̶t̶r̶u̶c̶t̶i̶o̶n̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶p̶r̶o̶p̶e̶r̶t̶y̶ ̶a̶f̶t̶e̶r̶ ̶r̶o̶b̶b̶i̶n̶g̶ ̶E̶v̶a̶ ̶o̶f̶ ̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶l̶l̶a̶m̶a̶s̶ I mean defeated Eva. Now he could make the jump. He bent his knees down, engaging himself into position, then he leaped.
Pedro soared through the sky, aiming for the purple and yellow blimp that was his getaway back home. Pedro leaped over the Andes mountains, towards the blimp, and he crashed into it, breaking an expensive $74k set of furniture upon which a $53k gamer pc and a set of $42k gamer socks sat. Pedro got back up and looked out the window, all of Peru sitting below him. He made sure the llamas were ok, and they were ok enough. One had a broken leg, and another looked like the result of a DooM glory kill, but other than that they were just fine.
Pedro made his way through the rooms of the blimp, which were various assortments of rich things and piles of gold, and then he made it to the drivers room, where the blimp's driver, Wario, sat.
"Pedro you sunova bitch! You made it!"
"Yep. Gamer."
"Speaking of gamer, Pedro I need my gamer socks, when we get back I'm having an erotic skype call with Mario."
"Switch to discord already. Also I broke the socks when I landed."
"Jesus Christ. Just get into the chair, were taking off for home."
Then they took off. When I say 'took off', I don't mean it was fast and exiting. Blimps move pretty slow, so it was more of a slog through nothing that took 12 hours.
A/N: And now, a look at our main characters (so far):
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
