Night Siren

Dating

There was an awkward silence between me and Tiffany since we got back from school. I was at my study table trying to busy myself reading those letters while she was on the bed reading her notes.

I tried to avoid her as much as possible after lunch break. I was a bit moody so I avoided everyone and just deal with myself alone.

But when we both got here in our dorm, my mood changed positively.

Honestly, I badly want to talk to her but I don't know how to start a conversation. It sounds ridiculous because I can easily get along with other people but it's Tiffany. She's different. She's special for me. This is why I'm acting weird like this around her because I know, I really like her.

I sighed heavily. Even if it's hard for me, I should make a move. Yes, I'm planning to tell her about my feelings for her. I'm just waiting for the right time. Or more like, I'm still gathering all my confidence to confess. It's not that I will ask her to be my girlfriend but I will just tell her what I feel so that, maybe she would consider it.

"Taeyeon," Tiffany suddenly called.

I stiffened and became more nervous "Y-yes?"

"Are you mad at me?" She sounded sad so I turned to her and shook my head.

"N-no... I'm not mad," I saw her sad face as she stared at me. She looked like a cute lost puppy.

"But why are you ignoring me?" She pouted. She was so adorable, I wanted to squeeze her.

"I'm not ignoring you..." I lied.

"You were," she insisted.

I sighed and stood up "I was just not in the mood." Then I walked to the bed and sat next to her.

"Why's that?" She asked as she tilted her head.

I shrugged "You know, it's a girl problem." Well, most girls are moody. I admit that but still, there are reasons behind it. We're not moody for nothing.

Tiffany kept her silence and she seemed not convinced.

"How about you? You looked indifferent," I changed the topic to her.

Tiffany looked away, she was surprised "Um... I was just... not in the mood either."

"Okay..." But why? Of course, there's a reason for that.

"Taeyeon..." Tiffany turned to me and stared into my eyes. "I'm sorry if I was like that... I just felt out of place because everyone is close to you. They greeted you, they gave you letters and even gifts. I felt left out because I just wanted your attention." She bashfully admitted. She stared at her hands on her lap.

She wanted what?! My heart started to beat furiously when I heard that. Was she telling me that because she also likes me? Nah, don't be assuming Taeyeon. But still, I was hoping for that.

"I'm sorry for making you feel that way..." I sincerely apologized.

She shook her head "No... I just realize that I was being selfish earlier."

I chuckled "Then I was being selfish too because I also wanted your attention but I couldn't find the right timing to approach you."

"Really?" Tiffany finally smiled. I swear, my heart was doing backflips and those butterflies were swarming in my stomach.

"Let's just find ways to have our own time together at school," I suggested.

Tiffany vigorously nodded "I like that idea. Sure!"

I smiled "It's a deal?" I offered my hand to shake.

She gladly took it and shook our hands "Deal."

I didn't want to but I had to let go of her hand, it was so soft and smooth. I won't be washing my hand for a while.

Suddenly, my phone started alarming like a siren. I took it then turned the alarm off. It was 8:55 pm. I changed and set that time because I make sure that I'm in my dorm before 9 pm.

"It's time?" Tiffany asked.

I nodded "Yes."

We waited as the silence filled the room. It wasn't awkward anymore.

"So I will take your picture when you become a guy and send it to your sister," she reminded me our plan.

"Oh, yes please. I'm sure my sister can help me."

"Taeyeon?" She called as she stared at me.

"Yes?"

"You just changed," she informed me. She was kinda amused. Well, it's magic.

"Oh.... okay," I looked down and saw my body already turned to a man.

"Give me your phone," Tiffany said as she stood up.

I handed her my phone and also stood up timidly.

"Please stand there," she instructed as she pointed to the wall. I just followed then she took some pictures of mine.

"Here... I think it's better. I'm sure they can edit your clothes and the background," Tiffany handed me the phone back.

I took it and without further ado, I emailed it to my sister. I asked her to make me IDs and documents. I explained to her that I want to make my boy version an identity like it exists.

"It's done, I sent it. Surely, she will reply tomorrow." I know my sister very well. She won't let me down.

"That's good. We should hangout when you got your ID," she proposed excitedly.

I nodded "Sure!"

"Another deal?" She asked playfully as she offered her hand to shake.

I gladly took it then shook our hands like business partners "Okay, deal."

We both let go and she giggled "Cool."

"Umm... Tiffany? About Siwon..." I couldn't help but to open that topic. It was bothering me "Is he courting you?"

Tiffany shook her head and smiled.

I sighed in relief. I'm so happy like I'm floating on cloud nine.

"Not anymore..." But that swiftly broke my sweet thought.

My forehead furrowed confused "What do you mean?" Geez, I held my breath and crossed my fingers discreetly. 

I hope it's not what I think it is.

"Because we're dating, he's my boyfriend now," Tiffany clarified.

I felt my heart cracked inside my chest and my world started to fall. I couldn't breathe properly and I felt my body became weak as I sat on the bed. It really sucks. Why do I feel like I lost everything?

"Are you alright Taeyeon?" She asked worried.

I just barely nodded.

There's no need to confess, she already likes someone else. And she's not into some weirdo like me. It hit me, I won't ever find someone that will like me because of my situation.

I should give up now.

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