The Dreams of Princes

Part XI

When Cas finally got up, he heard a huge commotion downstairs. Despite his exhaustion and the shitty sleep he had gotten, he was intensely curious. Deciding to hurry, he just threw on a different shirt and ran downstairs to see what was going on.

As Cas thumped down the stairs, he saw Sam standing, watching the commotion in the hall. Servants were scurrying around, taking bags, and Cas looked in confusion at Sam as he stepped up next to him to observe the chaos. Sam glanced at Cas, but he didn't ask any questions. Just smiled softly at him and turned back to his watching. Swallowing the lump in his throat, Cas did the same. Sam knew he had failed. Ignoring that, Cas tried to draw attention back to the chaos in front of them.

"What's going on?" He asked, standing on his toes to try to see over the crowd.

"I have no idea," Sam said, watching Cas's antics with an amused expression. "Some guy is here, and I feel like I should know him, but I can't place him."

Cas was about to answer Sam when he heard a slight quiet in the noise of the hall. Glancing over, he saw the servants moving away from the doorway. And at that moment, as the crowd of servants parted, there stood Gabriel.

Cas shrieked and threw himself through the hall at Gabriel. He had already missed his brother so much. Tackling him into a hug, he clutched Gabriel as he laughed. Sam glanced at the two of them, and then it clicked. He walked over after Cas had released him, smiling.

"Hey, I'm Sam," he said, waving awkwardly. Gabe turned to face Sam, and Cas knew exactly what was about to happen.

Cas saw Gabriel almost choke seeing Sam in person and snickered quietly. Cas knew damn well what Gabe's type was, and Sam was every standard he had. Gabriel didn't hear Cas's reaction. He was too busy gaping.

"Gabriel," he said, his voice strained. Sam shot him that sunshine smile, and Cas was almost certain Gabe was about to melt. Sam shot a hand out, and Gabe shook it slowly, as if he didn't want to let go. Eventually, he did, and he began looking anywhere but Sam, trying not to seem creepy. Cas nearly snorted, but he didn't say anything. Sam turned to Cas, a confused but excited smile on his face.

"I didn't know your brother was coming," he said.

"I didn't either," Cas said, turning to Gabe. "How'd you get here? And why?"

Gabe rubbed the back of his neck, looking nervously at Sam, who simply looked back at him, clueless. Cas immediately realized why, feeling slightly guilty all of a sudden. Turning to Gabe, he grabbed him by one shoulder, whispering to him.

"If it's mom and dad being weird, I already told him everything, mostly because I thought he'd never meet you," Cas said apologetically. Gabe nodded, relaxing significantly and looking to Cas to answer.

"After you left, mom and dad stopped talking to me. Like, at all. I felt frozen out of the house. So when I asked if I could come here, they shoved me out the door. Your parents knew, Sam, but obviously you guys didn't get the memo," Gabe said, chuckling. Cas hugged Gabe tightly, whispering in his ear.

"Not a single one of the princes in this building are straight," he whispered, and he felt Gabriel blushing. He leaned back and let go, leaving him to stew with that information. "I'm sure you'll fit in perfectly," he said louder.

Sam smiled, and at that moment, Dean came trudging down the stairs. Cas turned away sharply, still hurt, even though he shouldn't be. He knew why Dean did it. But he still needed time, and a lot of anger management.

Dean didn't seem to notice, meandering over to introduce himself to Gabe. Gabe, however, had seen Cas's reaction, and was decidedly cooler to this Winchester brother.

"Hey, I'm Dean," Dean said, sticking a hand out. Gabe nodded, not extending his own.

"Gabriel. Cas's brother," he said. Dean put his hand back awkwardly, rubbing his neck. He turned to Sam, trying to ask for backup, but Sam just gave him a cold look, as well. Dean must have told Sam why had happened, because Sam was pissed. Gabe turned to Cas, smiling and ignoring Dean and Sam's interaction entirely.

"What's a guy gotta do to get a room in this place?" He joked. Cas rolled his eyes, gesturing to Sam.

   "Yeah, I can show you there," Sam said, smiling again. Sam lead Gabe off, talking the whole way out of the room. If they weren't going to become a couple, Cas would lose several bets with himself.

Dean, now alone with Cas, moved closer to him, finally picking up on how cool Cas was acting. He reached out a hand to touch his arm, and Cas jerked away.

"Don't," he said. "Don't you fucking dare." Cas cringed at how raw and obvious his emotions were in his tone. Now he sounded like a desperate boy who fell in love after a first kiss. Great, fucking fantastic.

"Cas, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. I was trying to avoid that," Dean whispered. "You know we couldn't be together even if I wanted to, and it's not fair to you for me to lead you on like that," he said, his voice breaking. "Cas, please, look at me."

Cas looked at him, eyes glittering with unshed tears and anger. Dean stepped back, not expecting to see such anger in Cas. He had never really seen Cas angry before that moment, not towards anyone but the Braedens. But it was so different when Dean was the recipient, and Cas knew that. Frankly, he didn't give a shit.

"It's less fair for you to kiss me and then tell me to pretend you didn't," he spat, his voice shaking. Dean looked like he'd been hit, his face twisting. "That isn't fair either, Dean," he said, turning away as he felt tears coming. Dean didn't get to see him cry. Not anymore.

Dean, desperate to make Cas not hate him, reached and held Cas's face in his hands. Cas looked at him as tears slid down his face, debating on whether or not to move away. He knew he should, but he was so tired of running from things. His past, his duties, his love life, everything. Cas couldn't run anymore.

   Dean took this as Cas not being angry anymore, and he was desperate to fix this. He leaned in and kissed Cas, slowly and as if he were trying to drag all of the truth away.

Cas jerked back, slapping Dean and snapping him out of his stupid plan. Dean stepped back, his hand to his face in shock as he stared at Cas. Cas's shoulders heaved, and he could feel his anger and the combined pressure from the recent weeks boil over. It was going to explode in Dean, and frankly, Cas couldn't give a shit.

"Don't you dare fucking do that to me," Cas yelled. "Don't kiss me when you know you don't really want to be with me. Don't kiss me when you know you can't be with me. Don't do that shit to me and then try to act like you didn't break what we had. Don't."

With that, Cas turned, running up to his room as the first tears started to fall on Dean's face. Cas didn't see them, but he heard Dean's breathing, and he knew what was happening. No matter how much he cared about Dean, it had switched off. Cas could t bring himself to care at all that he'd hurt Dean after what Dean had done to him.

Slamming and locking the door to his room as soon as he got there, he slid against it, crying. Why couldn't the one person he wanted just want him back instead of being difficult and an asshole? And why did it have to be a situation so that even if he did, it would never work? Why Cas? It wasn't fair. It wasn't.

Putting in his headphones, he dragged himself up to the roof area Dean had showed him. He listened to music and watched the sun set, crying all the time. He shouldn't be so attached to someone he'd met a month ago, but he was. He was. And it was absolute bullshit.

Of all of the options here, he had fallen for the one person that didn't want him and couldn't have him if he did. Of course he had, like an idiot. Was it not enough that Cas wasn't accepted in his own family? Why did he have to be stupid enough to fall for the one guy who'd never reciprocate?

For the second night in a row, Cas cried himself to sleep as he lay against the roof tile and the stone wall of the castle.

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ANGST ANGST ANGST