ALONE #Wattys2015 COMPLETED

CHAPTER 3 // ZOE

I wake up the next morning and check the time, its 9:30am. I get out of bed quietly, too scared to wake up my mother or get her attention. Any sort of noise and she will try to come into my room. My door is broken enough and one more hit to it will take it down for sure. As I get out of my bed I check my phone there is a message from Jonny. It says;

J BOY:

Good morning sunshine! J Hope you had a good sleep! You wanna do something today? I can pick you up from your house if you want, text back soon xx

TO: J BOY:

Good morning! J Yeah we can meet up today, I just have work at 12:30 till 5pm so if we are gonna do something, we can do it before. We can meet in the park if you want?

J BOY:

Yeah sure...meet you in the park, where we ran into each other, cya there in around 30 minutes!

TO: J BOY:

Oka sure, cya soon!

I quickly go to the weather app on my phone and check or today, it is going to be 25 degrees today, so I grab my white dress to wear for the day. I grab a small backpack to put my work clothes in so I don't have to come back to this horrid house. I grab my phone from the charger and I make sure my door is locked and I carefully make my out of my window. Sliding it down I jump down and make my way to meet Jonny.

It is 10:05am as I walk into the park to see Jonny sitting on one of the seats waiting for me. He looks up just as I spot him and he smiles at me as he gets up and walks towards me. As he wraps his arms around me I embrace his hug smiling.
"How are you?" he asks.
"Good," I say, better now I'm with you I think to myself. "How are you?"
"Great now I'm with you," he says and winks at me, I feel my cheeks go red. "Why do you have a backpack with you?"
"So I can get to work on time, my work clothes are in there," I say.
"Oh smart, where you work?"
"Tu Lin's Café," I say.
"Oh, we should've went there yesterday,"
"Nah, it's alright, the café yesterday was a nice one anyway,"
"Oh, I might just pop in then while you're working and order something there then," he says and winks at me.
"So, do you work anywhere?" I ask curious.
"Yeah, I work at Jonny Boy's Pizza Pallor,"
"Jonny Boy's Pizza Pallor? I've never heard of it before," I say.
"I didn't either, until I was going for a job and someone recommended it to me, besides it has the same name as me so why not go for a job there," he says smiling.
"True," I say.
"So, what do you wanna do? We can go get some brunch if you want, so you eat a big meal before you go to work," he suggests.
The idea sounds good but my head goes straight to my weight, I immediately look down and frown. I really don't want to turn down Jonny again so I decide to just go with it, I may as well just order something small.
"Sure, I would love to go," I say smiling.
"Great, I thought you were gonna turn me down" he says.
"Oh," is all I manage to say. "Where should we eat?"
"Wanna go Positano's?" he asks.
"Sure," I say.
As we walk to Positano's, it is silent. But it wasn't awkward silence, just peaceful silence.
 When we finally arrive at the restaurant and go and get a table. We choose a table away from everyone else so it's quiet.
"So.." I say.
"Soo.." he says.
"What days do you have your gridiron matches?" I ask.
"Every weekend, either Saturday or Sunday, but I can message you when and where the matches are. In fact, I could pick you up so you come with me to them if you like," he says. This idea sounds amazing today me, but once again I can't let him see my mum.
"I would like that, but what if it was easier if I went myself?" I say hoping he doesn't get curious. He raises an eyebrow for a second and then let it slide.
"Sure, or you could stay at my house the night before so it's even easier," he says.
"We could have a fabulous movie night," I say.
"Yes, we will!" he says, and we laugh. The waitress comes to our table with the menus, stays for a moment staring at Jonny then walks off.
"I wonder what that was about," I say.
"Oh that, it um was my ex," he says awkwardly.
"Oh," is all I manage to say. We each pick up the menus and just focus on those.
"What are you gonna get?" he asks.
"I might just get the gnocchi," I say. "What will you get?"
"Pizza, I love pizza. When you come over we can order a lot of pizza," he says. "Wait, you do like pizza yeah?"
"Of course, I love pizza!" I say, we smile at each other and wait for the waitress to come. Once she comes we realise it isn't Jonny's ex, it is someone else.
"Hi, what would you like to order?" she says.
"I'll have a BBQ pizza please," Jonny says. "And for the lady," he looks at me and winks.
"I'll have a gnocchi please," I say smiling.
"Coming right up," and the lady walks off.
"Well at least it wasn't as awkward as before" Jonny says.
"Haha, yeah," I say.
We talk for a bit while we wait for the food to come. It comes around 15 minutes later, and we start eating. I take a bit of gnocchi, it tastes delicious. Oh the joys of eating Italian food.
"Aye, can I ask you a question?" Jonny says. A pit drops into my stomach and I'm nervous for what's about to come.
"Sure," I say.
"How come I never get to like, pick you up from your place or anything like that," he says. And what he asks was my worst fear, him knowing about my mother would probably scare him away.
"Um, well you see, it's just," I say then look down.
"Are you hiding something from me?" he asks firmly.
"Jonny, it's hard to explain, and I'm scared if I do tell you, you won't wanna hang out with me anymore and we won't be friends." I say. "Jonny, you're my only friend,"
"What about your parents, or siblings or other relatives, don't they care for you?"
"I, I can't say Jonny, I'm sorry," I say, tears bludging up in my eyes.
"Then we can't be friends if there are secrets between us, we have to trust each other, I trust you Zoe, don't you trust me?" he asks.
"I do trust you Jonny-"
"Then why won't you tell me?"
"Because I can't, I don't want you to get hurt, so I can't. I'm sorry," I say, the tears start to roll down my cheeks.
"Fine, I better go then, I have no time for fake friends." He says, as he gets up he leaves a $50 note on the table and walks off. I leave a $20 since that's all I have on me and go after him.
"Jonny, no wait please," I say. But he ignores me and walks off. I'm left there in the middle of the street, tears falling down my face. People walk past me and either gives me sympathetic looks or disgusted looks. I quickly make my way home and avoid eye contact with anyone as I'm running.
Once I get home, I jump through my window and close it, I take my shoes off at chuck them across the room.
I scream.
Why, why, why. It was all going so well. I finally had a friend, someone who cared about me and then it all got ruined because I didn't have the guts to tell him about my horrid history. I slam my fist against the wall and scream again. Tears still rolling down my face. I don't care if I wake that old hag up; I don't care if she comes in and hits me even more.
I don't care anymore. I make my way to my bath room and open up the cupboard.

I take out my razor and roll up my sleeves.
The razor hits my skin and I start to aggressively hold it against my wrist as I slide it side to side. Left, right, left right. The blood is streaming down, and my cuts are thawing with pain. Left, right, left, right. I don't stop. The pain keeps come at me like a wrecking ball. Left, right, left, right. Don't stop, keep doing this. It's what I deserve anyway.
I continue to scrape the razor against both my wrists, I fall to the ground of my bathroom, the tiles hitting my head.

Then everything goes black. 
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A/N: I really hope you guys liked this story!

I'm trying as hard as I can to write and upload as much as I can so you guys can read it!

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xx Gabby (: