Phantoms' Soar {Up For Adoption}

• Chapter 6: Sickness Kicks In •

TW: Anorexia, Bulimia, Self-Inflicted Pain, Self-Depreciation?

Virgil's POV

I stare at the food on my plate, the only light in my room coming from dark purple fairy lights strung in the shape of a star.

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I sit on the floor of my bathroom, swaying from side to side, my mind and eyes fuzzy. (Trust me, this isn't fun.) I try to stand up, the counter supporting my weight. I flush the toilet and clean up any proof of my Bulimia. (Nervosa) As I do that, I remove my hand from the counter, and my balance disappears. I fall back against my door, a loud thud coming from it. I groan in pain and I try to stand up again, swaying badly as black dots swarm my vision. I hear a cracking, almost hidden by a creaking of a door. As this is all happening, my vision is filled with black dots but also blurred, and my mind is fogged over.
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My vision clears and I sit up, my mind still slightly fogged which causes my eyes to look glazed over. I hear a ton on questions flooding towards me. I groan and glance over, seeing Echo sitting in a chair. She repeats one of the questions. "What happened to you?!" I feel my sleeve pulling up and I quickly tug it back down. I barely notice, but she catches and notes it. "Nothing bad, Ec." I could tell she didn't believe me, and she pressed it. "I have noticed. I rarely see you eat, even when we don't have to steal it. I doubt you're okay." I turn my head and pain runs through it, making me want to faint. I could hold pain and make it seem invisible to everyone, but you can never make pain disappear, can ya? I notice how she examines my room through the whole conversation, and I see her eyes linger on a couple of bottles of painkillers.

We're having a 'family meeting' and the only thing running through my head are horrible things I've been called by my brother and parents.

Waste of space

Worthless

Disorder

Monster

Unnecessary

Pointless

Failure

Bad

Disappointment

Useless

That's just a few.

I'm basically pure anxiety.

I'm useless.

I don't have a life here.

I just ruin the family.

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When you're falling in a forest, and there's nobody around, do you ever really crash, or even make a sound?

I've learned to slam on the brake
Before I even turn the key
Before I make the mistake
Before I lead with the worst of me

Give them no reason to stare
No slippin' up if you slip away
So I got nothing to share
No, I got nothing to say

Step out, step out of the sun
If you keep getting burned
Step out, step out of the sun
Because you've learned, because you've learned

On the outside, always looking in
Will I ever be more than I've always been?
'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass
I'm waving through a window
I try to speak, but nobody can hear
So I wait around for an answer to appear
While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass
I'm waving through a window, oh
Can anybody see, is anybody waving back at me?

We start with stars in our eyes
We start believing that we belong
But every sun doesn't rise
And no one tells you where you went wrong

Step out, step out of the sun
If you keep getting burned
Step out, step out of the sun
Because you've learned, because you've learned

On the outside, always looking in
Will I ever be more than I've always been?
'Cause I'm tap, tap, tapping on the glass
Waving through a window
I try to speak, but nobody can hear
So I wait around for an answer to appear
While I'm watch, watch, watching people pass
Waving through a window, oh
Can anybody see, is anybody waving?

When you're falling in a forest and there's nobody around
Do you ever really crash, or even make a sound?
When you're falling in a forest and there's nobody around
Do you ever really crash, or even make a sound?
When you're falling in a forest and there's nobody around
Do you ever really crash, or even make a sound?
When you're falling in a forest and there's nobody around
Do you ever really crash, or even make a sound?
Did I even make a sound?
Did I even make a sound?
It's like I never made a sound
Will I ever make a sound?

Hah.

Hi.